Consumer Watch

Wendy Knowler fights for your rights...

John Scott Masthead
July 3 2014 at 09:29

William Booth, the criminal lawyer currently prevented from representing various clients in court because of his sore knee, should take comfort from the fact that there are a lot of us with the same problem.

In fact some enterprising fellow knee-sufferers could establish a Confraternity of Patella Chondromalacians, which is a fancy way of describing people with a pain in the knee. Membership would be oversubscribed.

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July 1 2014 at 10:10

Women allegedly drive more carefully than men, according to a survey of 24 000 South African motorists who downloaded apps which had used the speedometer and GPS function on their cellphones to record their behaviour on the roads.

I am quoting now. I am not quite sure what an app is, and even if I was I wouldn’t dream of putting one on my cellphone to expose my driving habits. Not that I possess a cellphone, anyway, because my wife does enough cellphoning for both us. Technologically I am quite happy to admit I am a bit behind the times.

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June 26 2014 at 06:20

As the sole white Afrikaner member of the ANC’s city council caucus, white-bearded Koos Bredenhand tends to stick out, like a patriarch in the wrong kraal.

Yesterday morning he seemed to draw attention to himself for the wrong reasons.

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June 24 2014 at 09:24

Some observers might have thought that our MPs were sufficiently men and women of the world not to be shocked by the presence of a sex shop so close to their place of work.

They clearly don’t understand how easily such an emporium could distract parliamentarians from their important legislative duties. It could replace matters of state in their minds with sexual imaginings.

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June 19 2014 at 08:41

Tim Noakes's high-fat, low-carbohydrate diet may well enable you to lose weight – some of my friends are mere shadows of their former selves after following it, and a photograph of Noakes himself, with his belt tightened several notches, shows how scrawny you can become, if you like that sort of thing.

I listened to his debate with my old friend Lionel Opie (actually, Tim is an old friend, too – many years ago before he was famous we flew up to East London together where we were joint speakers at a high-school prize-giving), and decided to stick with Lionel in my eating habits.

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