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In some countries the identity of the spymasters is a closely guarded secret that is sometimes never revealed, the subject of much misguided speculation on the part of would-be novelists and pesky investigative reporters.
But not in South Africa where we not only know the name of the head of the Secret Service but also, without too much difficulty, his e-mail address and cellphone number.
It must be hard being a spy when everyone knows who you are but, then again, you have to wonder who our Secret Service actually spies on. This agency is apparently the external one for intelligence gathering - not the internal one that is able to tap your phone - and deals ostensibly with foreign threats.
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It is hard to see that they can be all that busy, you know, unless of course one of our neighbours, perhaps Zimbabwe, has suddenly been endowed with some unexpected intelligence.
By the very nature of his dangerous line of work, it is unlikely that Mr Mo Shaik will take kindly to advice from an irritating columnist but let's have a stab anyway.
In this column's view, our very own M could best put his skills to work by digging a bit into foreign sporting affairs. This is where we really need to uncover some secrets if we are to keep pace with the rest of the world.
Just for starters, his Secret Service might like to infiltrate the New Zealand cricket camp to discover exactly what they do that we don't.
You will know that New Zealand is one of the lower ranked cricket nations, yet its escapades at major limited overs tournaments are nothing short of spectacular, a sort of shiny black stealth bomber. Our team, on the other hand, is precisely the opposite, which is a mystery that grows deeper with each passing elimination.
Another mystery that demands some unraveling concerns our football team and those who guide it. Once the champions of Africa, we are now reduced to mere stragglers. Could M possibly look into this, perhaps put a call into his undercover man in Yamoussoukro or Abidjan, to find out what we might do to up our game?
Our new football chief, the one who insists he is no one's puppet, was suggesting only yesterday that we should not only be aiming to become No 1 in Africa again, but No 1 in the world.
Perhaps therein lies the secret that is best espoused by the New Zealand cricket team - never believe you're bigger than you actually are.
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This article was originally published on page 24 of The Star on October 05, 2009
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