10 habits of highly sexual people

IO_life marilyn monroe0 AP Marilyn Monroe plays a saloon entertainer in this scene from the 1954 film River Of No Return.

Pre-orgasmic. Someone who's not yet had an orgasm. It's astounding to think that Marilyn Monroe, that absolute icon of sexuality, fell into this category despite three husbands and a long line of highly accomplished lovers. Until her psychiatrist told her about masturbation, that is - after which she waxed lyrical about female orgasms to him.

Off-screen and on, Marilyn oozed sex in a way that few could ever hope to emulate. She used sex to boost her career and attain rich and powerful lovers - yet the ultimate sexual pleasure, sex for sex's sake, eluded her until she neared the end of her 36 years.

While most could never dream of attaining her luminosity and sex icon status, all of us have at some stage or another come across people who similarly ooze sex appeal, whether or not they meet our personal criteria of sexiness.

Some people are simply highly sexual. They tap into a sexual energy that vitalises them - to the extent that you can spot them a mile away. And without being able to put your finger on why, you know they'd be superb in bed. What habits do highly sexual people have that set them apart from the milling crowd of sexual wannabes?

1. They think of sex frequently and surround themselves with stimuli that trigger desire. Dwelling on thoughts of sex arouses desire, which is communicated non-verbally and heightens their sex appeal.

2. They pursue - and usually attain - frequent sex. Sex is good for our health, both physically and psychologically, and the results show. It's also self-reinforcing because the more sex we have, the more we want it.

3. They practise spontaneity, seeking sex whenever a good opportunity arises - and even when it doesn't. This often involves some risk-taking, especially when it comes to sex outdoors or in semi-public places. The thrill of being caught in the act adds sexual tension and heightens sensation.

4. They are sexually adventurous and constantly seek new sexual paths, which keeps things fresh. Their openness to explore new techniques, new venues and new positions makes them an exciting partner.

5. They laugh frequently and use humour in the bedroom to dispel any tension or to defuse potentially embarrassing situations, which are inevitable with sex. People are drawn to laughter, and it bonds them as partners.

6. They're not afraid to ask for what they want in bed, no matter how risqué or taboo the sexual activity may seem. They're confident enough to be themselves and risk rejection. When faced with a negative response, are likely to think of another risqué request.

7. They look after their bodies in an effort to attract mates. They usually exercise and eat healthily. How they look is important - because if we look good, we tend feel good. They often dress to flatter their best assets and pay attention to personal grooming.

8. They are highly tactile people who squeeze, cuddle and kiss their partners frequently even when not initiating sex. This intimate contact out of the bedroom reinforces their prowess between the sheets because it conveys love and affection.

9. Instead of worrying about their physical shortcomings, they focus on giving and receiving sexual pleasure. Their self acceptance gives them confidence and sexual self-esteem, which increases their success between the sheets.

10. They relish pleasure in all forms, devouring food that delights their senses, pursuing relaxation activities with gusto, admiring and appreciating beauty for beauty's sake. Their passion for life draws people to them, especially potential lovers, and further enhances their sex appeal.

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TM, wrote

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01:57pm on 4 May 2011
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This so tru, sex is healthy and invigorates the mind, souland the body. Theres nothing like too much sex, just explore and enjoy as much as you can

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SubjectiveArticle, wrote

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06:52am on 3 May 2011
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Swinging cut divorce rates??! http:www.ehow.cominfo_8150519_reasons-rise-divorces.html please get a grip; don't just say what your partner deceived you with cause she's bored of you.

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Anonymous, wrote

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01:36pm on 1 May 2011
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funny how a 45 yr old can afford to have sex 5-6times a day....lol...makes u think.....come on at 36&45 come on

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Anonymous, wrote

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12:40am on 1 May 2011
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My my, some frigid commenters here - maybe you need to have more sex, might loosen you up a bit. ;)

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Stephen G. Barr, Group Publisher, wrote

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05:39pm on 30 April 2011
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Dead on the money per my personal experience!

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Mark, wrote

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05:27pm on 30 April 2011
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It is really sad to see all the negative and bitter comments here. It is your loss! I live like this, my wife (of 12 years) is like this and I lots of other amazing women who live like this....and no we are no bipolar and we are not on drugs. If we are on anything it is called Love!!

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Anonymous, wrote

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02:58pm on 30 April 2011
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Uhhhh, sure...where's the source for all these claims? Statistics? Studies? Endorsements? So sad when columnists have to resort to making stuff up to make a deadline. This shouldn't be in Lifestyle, should be in Blogs or some other such claptrap. Figuring out what makes you sexually able and attractive is and always has been a personal thing, just like relationships. I wish these idiots would stop pidgeonholing everyone.

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Anonymous, wrote

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12:01pm on 30 April 2011
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Mostly true. 1,2,4,5,6,9,10. Though the link between confidence and risk-taking when asking for taboo things is tenuous; more likely your lover and you have discussed "risque" behaviors. BTW, anal is not risque or adventurous, its standard behavior. Want to keep things "new?" Get another person involved, or a couple, or try the darker sides of pleasure. Swinging and BDSM cut down on divorce rates and nonconsensual infidelity.

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Anonymous, wrote

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05:59am on 30 April 2011
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11.) They usually display the typical compulsive symptoms of addiction.

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Anonymous, wrote

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03:46am on 30 April 2011
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As a woman I couldn't agree more to this list; my lover and I have sex daily, sometimes 5-6 times. I'm 36 and he is 45, so don't think it doesn't happen. We're also madly in love after 7 years.

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Gruntwilligar, wrote

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02:07am on 30 April 2011
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speaking as a highly sexual person, I am not in the best of shape. In fact, I am 80lbs overweight. Yet I am still able to have a great sex life with some stunningly beautiful and sexy ladies. I sometimes have to turn a lover away because of time contraints, work, shopping, etc. I treat a lady with respect, tell her she is pretty and when I see her true inner beauty I tell her she is beautiful.

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Postaholics Anonymous, wrote

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11:16pm on 29 April 2011
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12) They don't play lots and lots and lots of World of Warcraft....

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Suzie Q, wrote

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09:19pm on 29 April 2011
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These are also the habits of highly BIPOLAR people (which is what Marilyn Monroe was) and this is highly idiotic reporting.

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GillB, wrote

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09:03pm on 29 April 2011
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A good article Romy - I suspect I'm old enough to be your grandmother and pleased to say that you know what you are talking about.

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Jade, wrote

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08:36pm on 29 April 2011
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Common, just take the list of things you like to do and assume that they're healthy because you just know you're so smart and would never do anything stupid. I'm sure that scientists really are wrong and you really do know better than them; your MA in Romance Literature really makes you an authority on these things, just deconstruct them! Remember, logic and reason are tools of the patriarchy.

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Anonymous, wrote

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07:47pm on 29 April 2011
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Pretty close to the mark. As a MARRIED person who often feels 'off' bc of a very high sex drive, to those of you crying fowl - were you looking for a pill to 'fix' yourselves? I am not the one that is off... its anyone who isn't getting 'enough'. Perhaps you should examine YOURSELF for that answer.

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Anonymous, wrote

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06:32pm on 29 April 2011
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What a load of crap. This is not reporting, this is speculation and too many Mills & Boon novels. Don't be mad because you don't fall into this somewhere.

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Obvious, wrote

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06:20pm on 29 April 2011
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11.) They don't get married.

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Anonymous, wrote

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06:14pm on 29 April 2011
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I sense a lot of bitterness in the comments. Pitty. #11. Learn from a young Swedish girl, as she will keep your motor running longer than a porn star. (Personal experience) And if you live life like 1-10 above, you may just get a chance to bone a porn star or find a young swedish lover. Again, I pitty you bitter fools.

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Anonymous, wrote

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05:57pm on 29 April 2011
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Dave, how predictable—that someone would make a comment that follows a socially prescribed stereotype of women's sexuality. As a woman I can tell you are SO WRONG.

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