10 secrets men wish you knew

So, what does your man want?

So, what does your man want?

Published Jul 22, 2011

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Women sometimes find it bit tricky to understand what makes their man tick - especially if he is like many guys and finds it hard to open up and express his needs or feelings verbally.

If you are wondering what's going on under his calm and cool exterior, here are some basics about men that he may want you to know but doesn't know how to tell you:

1. Sex isn't 'just sex'

It's a stereotype that to a guy, having sex is just sex - in fact, many view it as an very important act between two people who are committed to each other. Most guys are more satisfied with sexual intimacy in a committed relationship because long-term partners have a better idea of how to please each other in bed.

2. He may show his love through doing

Rather than saying the words, I love you, some men prefer to show how they feel by doing things around the home. If you're concerned that he's not expressing his feelings for you, watch what he's doing to make your world a better place. Those little actions speak volumes.

3. He feels loved through sex

While most women bond with their man by spending time chatting (which builds emotional intimacy and a desire for sex) guys tend to do it the other way round. They bond and feel loved through the closeness created by sexual intimacy. This is why sex is a hugely important part of love for them and so, not surprisingly…

4. He wants you to prioritise your sex life

If you put him last on your list of things to do late at night, he's going to feel neglected and that he's becoming less and less important to you. Granted, kids take a lot of time and energy, and so do the demands of the office. But happy partners create a happy home environment - focus on your sex life together and you and your kids will reap the benefits of a strong, loving relationship.

5. He needs some space

Men need time to themselves. It's healthy for both partners to maintain their identities as individuals as well as doing things together as a couple. If you encourage him to pursue his own hobbies, whether it's going for long bike rides, gaming with friends or carpentry, by giving him space to do his own thing he'll have more to give to you in return.

6. He wants you to initiate sex more often

Sex is a two-way thing and it isn't solely the guy's job to get the ball rolling. Women often feel men should be the hunters but guys like to feel pursued too. There's nothing sexier for a man than a woman who's so hot for him she can't stop herself from ripping his clothes off. When you initiate sex, you make him feel desirable and sexy, and that's a huge turn on for a guy.

7. He feels loved when you respect him

It's important to a man to feel respected by his partner and it's strongly linked with his feelings of being loved. If he feels you don't respect him and his ability to make good decisions, he may question your love for him. Treat him with respect and he'll be very willing to please - and pleasure - you.

8. He wants you to be adventurous in bed

If you grew up with the notion that “good girls don't have sex”, throw this out with your inhibitions. Good girls love great sex - and are entitled to it. You'd better believe he wants it too. He wants you to be daring and open to trying new things - new sex positions, sexy lingerie, different venues, new sex techniques and sex toys - to keep things fresh and exciting.

9. He takes commitment seriously

Men tend to take longer to commit because they know they'll be in it for the long haul and they want to be sure they're making the right choice. Just because he's reluctant to tell you the words you may be waiting to hear, it doesn't mean he's not committed to you. Most guys who commit tend to be happy with their decision and say they would marry their current partner again.

10. He bonds through shared activities

Men build their relationships by doing things together, rather than by sharing their thoughts and feelings. They usually feel closer to their partner through joint activities like sex or sport. If you want him to feel more of a bond with you, find an activity you enjoy doing together - and of course, have plenty of great sex. - IOL

 

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