Do women really hate sex?

Comment on this story


stephen fry libjpg

REUTERS

(File photo) British actor Stephen Fry.

London - Can science shed some light on Stephen Fry’s recent comments about female sexuality?

Do women really find sex disgusting and only partake of the gruesome act to get their man to “commit”, as the actor and TV host suggested in an interview with Attitude magazine?

The deep frying of Fry for his ill-chosen words, which he insists were made in jest and taken out of context, is perhaps unjustified.

The science suggests he might have a point, but only if the long view of human sexuality is taken into account – in other words, the reason sex has evolved in the first place.

Biologically, sex is a way of mixing the genes between two individuals to produce a genetic variety in the offspring that would not exist with asexual reproduction, such as cloning.

Many animals and plants engage in sexual reproduction because it confers an advantage, and the fact that sex has been practised for hundreds of millions of years by a plethora of life forms attests to its biological importance.

But explaining the reasons for sexual reproduction does not explain why we have just two sexes, and why males and females are so different from each other.

To understand that, we need to understand the two competing and mutually exclusive “strategies” employed by each sex in order to reproduce.

Females produce egg cells, which are relatively large structures representing a sizeable investment in the future compared to sperm cells. This investment gets magnified substantially in female mammals, including humans, who get pregnant, lactate and are involved in years of strenuous child care.

For a female mammal, therefore, reproduction is not something to be undertaken lightly.

Females of many species, including humans, should therefore be “choosy” – that might mean looking for commitment from a male if shared offspring-rearing is important in that species.

Males have taken an opposing strategy. They invest very little in each sperm cell, which is no more than a package of tightly wrapped DNA attached to a propeller. Instead of quality, males have gone for quantity, because their strategy is to inseminate as many females as possible.

This explains why one man can inseminate many hundreds of women in a lifetime, but a woman can only bear children from no more than a dozen or so men.

The problem for the male, however, is that even in an utterly promiscuous society where females are available to everyone, there is a high risk of not finding a female who hasn’t already been inseminated.

This leads to intense competition between males for mates and the rise of elaborate ways for them to beat their fellow sperm-producers to the precious female eggs.

At its most complex, this results in males trying to exclude their females from other males by force – leading to social organisations based on harems that are defended by the size of your antlers (or your wallet).

Although some human societies are polygamous, most are based on some variation of monogamy, either serial or lifetime.

But monogamy does not preclude promiscuity, as exemplified by married footballers.

As a species, human males fall somewhere between gorillas and chimpanzees in terms of their propensity to promiscuity.

We can say this from looking at the relative size of a man’s testicles compared to those of the gorilla (slightly promiscuous, small testes) and chimps (highly promiscuous, very large testes).

So what has this got to do with whether women enjoy sex as much as men? The answer is that it provides the long evolutionary backdrop to human sexual behaviour, which could explain differences between the two sexes.

That there is a difference between the sexes is self-evident. It manifests in terms of physical and psychological distinctions that are, in general, fairly easy to categorise as either “male” or “female”, although there are always going to be some individuals who fall between the two statistical “norms”.

Charles Darwin took a keen interest in why such differences between the sexes have evolved and came up with the idea of sexual selection.

In essence, sexual selection explained how the peacock got his tail. Sexual selection says it was because the peacock is the victim of female choice – choosy peahens are attracted to the males with the longest, most elaborate tails.

Without getting into the details of the evolutionary reasons for sexual selection, many of the physical distinctions between men and women, such as beards and breasts, are also thought to have resulted from sexual selection.

It is a reminder that we are at heart sexual animals who evolved over millions of years.

Evolutionary theory, however, can only go so far in explaining human sexuality, which is after all controlled by that most mysterious of human features, consciousness.

It is often said that the human brain is the sexiest organ, and there is abundant evidence to suggest that is especially true for women.

Men’s sexuality appears to be less cerebral, and more deep-rooted in the more ancient “reptilian” part of the brain.

One other mystery of human sexuality is the female orgasm, which serves no obvious biological function.

Humans might be one of the few species where females actually enjoy sex physically as much as males when it comes to orgasmic pleasure.

So although biology can go a long way to explaining sexuality in humans, it cannot explain everything – including why some people are attracted to the same sex. – The Independent


sign up
 
 

Comment Guidelines



  1. Please read our comment guidelines.
  2. Login and register, if you haven’ t already.
  3. Write your comment in the block below and click (Post As)
  4. Has a comment offended you? Hover your mouse over the comment and wait until a small triangle appears on the right-hand side. Click triangle () and select "Flag as inappropriate". Our moderators will take action if need be.

     

Coret
I'm a 37 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 18 and 100.
View Profile
Ans15
I'm a 44 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 35 and 50.
View Profile
Blaq_chic
I'm a 25 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 25 and 45.
View Profile
nhk
I'm a 51 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 45 and 54.
View Profile
Zuluwoman
I'm a 38 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 35 and 100.
View Profile
lonelylady1966gct
I'm a 47 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 50 and 60.
View Profile
mamagti
I'm a 31 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 45.
View Profile
honeydrops
I'm a 21 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 23 and 28.
View Profile
mtshali074
I'm a 22 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 25 and 58.
View Profile
Sedy001
I'm a 32 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 45.
View Profile
riscilla
I'm a 22 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 25 and 45.
View Profile
Azanda
I'm a 30 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 45.
View Profile
BabaORiley
I'm a 27 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 28 and 32.
View Profile
tmay
I'm a 36 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 37 and 42.
View Profile
Main
I'm a 52 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 45 and 70.
View Profile
lavenderyellow
I'm a 39 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 35 and 43.
View Profile
sugarplumgal
I'm a 32 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 45.
View Profile
Pinksnowie
I'm a 23 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 25 and 45.
View Profile
Miss_B_183
I'm a 26 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 40.
View Profile
Gellyireneshuro
I'm a 26 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 45.
View Profile
Annie426
I'm a 23 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 22 and 32.
View Profile
Pennym
I'm a 28 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 25 and 45.
View Profile
Stheh123
I'm a 22 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 25 and 30.
View Profile
Doodlebug106
I'm a 23 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 20 and 35.
View Profile
NeLaairR
I'm a 19 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 19 and 23.
View Profile
RambleOn
I'm a 36 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 38 and 48.
View Profile
Tro55
I'm a 29 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 50.
View Profile
Soulmateseeker_931
I'm a 50 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 40 and 55.
View Profile
hmz
I'm a 30 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 40.
View Profile
butterfly3R
I'm a 40 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 35 and 45.
View Profile
phatmadam
I'm a 28 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 34 and 42.
View Profile
N0nat
I'm a 27 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 35.
View Profile
mazet23
I'm a 27 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 26 and 37.
View Profile
abbygail_016
I'm a 22 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 28 and 35.
View Profile
destinyrider
I'm a 39 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 34 and 48.
View Profile
vicky4christ
I'm a 28 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 32 and 45.
View Profile
Goldengirl665
I'm a 25 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 25 and 35.
View Profile
ONTHA_042
I'm a 31 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 45.
View Profile
letsdothis11
I'm a 28 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 29 and 45.
View Profile
Phumi900
I'm a 29 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 28 and 50.
View Profile
ntando_784
I'm a 33 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 40 and 50.
View Profile
Eve001
I'm a 63 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 60 and 65.
View Profile
LouBean
I'm a 37 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 33 and 49.
View Profile
bridget396
I'm a 22 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 25 and 30.
View Profile
JhbNewby
I'm a 27 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 27 and 37.
View Profile
livinglife22
I'm a 31 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 32 and 45.
View Profile
Immaculate8m
I'm a 26 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 28 and 48.
View Profile
spoonkie
I'm a 23 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 27 and 35.
View Profile
codelyne
I'm a 25 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 27 and 35.
View Profile
confidence746
I'm a 44 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 40 and 55.
View Profile
Dea_
I'm a 47 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 45 and 52.
View Profile
Feist
I'm a 53 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 50 and 59.
View Profile
Charmaine001
I'm a 29 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 32 and 45.
View Profile
lulubaby
I'm a 32 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 70.
View Profile
tranquility_01
I'm a 29 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 31 and 38.
View Profile
nelloma
I'm a 30 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 36.
View Profile
Lynelle
I'm a 41 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 40 and 45.
View Profile
Sweetpea1977
I'm a 36 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 34 and 48.
View Profile
Taya_38
I'm a 38 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 32 and 45.
View Profile
potentialdifference
I'm a 24 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 25 and 45.
View Profile
Nonopie
I'm a 28 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 27 and 35.
View Profile
MssLee
I'm a 29 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 40.
View Profile
Afrochic_885
I'm a 22 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 28 and 35.
View Profile
Kelly_166
I'm a 22 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 27 and 34.
View Profile
1993
I'm a 20 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 20 and 38.
View Profile
violet_222
I'm a 45 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 40 and 53.
View Profile
Waitnomore
I'm a 41 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 40 and 50.
View Profile
kaer
I'm a 21 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 23 and 28.
View Profile
mako_001
I'm a 34 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 35 and 70.
View Profile
ChB_3110
I'm a 45 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 38 and 45.
View Profile
Fragileheart050
I'm a 37 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 37 and 45.
View Profile
Exoticlove444
I'm a 34 year old woman looking to meet men between the ages of 30 and 50.
View Profile
holatumza
I'm a 43 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 18 and 100.
View Profile
lihle001tt
I'm a 44 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 25 and 45.
View Profile
Mazing
I'm a 39 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 27 and 45.
View Profile
Procrastination_082
I'm a 42 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 20 and 31.
View Profile
KING1st
I'm a 35 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 18 and 28.
View Profile
obasol
I'm a 35 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 25 and 45.
View Profile
charged
I'm a 39 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 25 and 35.
View Profile
Chibode
I'm a 37 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 24 and 35.
View Profile
Tshepon
I'm a 36 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 25 and 32.
View Profile
javas2298
I'm a 43 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 25 and 45.
View Profile
mgiji
I'm a 42 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 25 and 35.
View Profile
Net01
I'm a 37 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 25 and 37.
View Profile
Kwenzo
I'm a 41 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 35 and 50.
View Profile
IceTy
I'm a 41 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 27 and 41.
View Profile
cocoti13
I'm a 43 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 36 and 65.
View Profile
Arcane77
I'm a 46 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 28 and 46.
View Profile
proguyfound
I'm a 49 year old man looking to meet men between the ages of 18 and 57.
View Profile
Mpko
I'm a 47 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 30 and 38.
View Profile
Takeme
I'm a 43 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 18 and 100.
View Profile
Gigson
I'm a 39 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 23 and 36.
View Profile
Aquadux
I'm a 59 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 49 and 55.
View Profile
Castorjhb
I'm a 45 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 35 and 46.
View Profile
Loxman
I'm a 43 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 20 and 60.
View Profile
Washe
I'm a 36 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 25 and 33.
View Profile
Fiba01
I'm a 28 year old man looking to meet men between the ages of 18 and 45.
View Profile
Mananco10
I'm a 26 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 18 and 45.
View Profile
spurwing921
I'm a 43 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 25 and 45.
View Profile
Tanzani
I'm a 30 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 28 and 45.
View Profile
whynt
I'm a 28 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 25 and 45.
View Profile
mxova_0506
I'm a 33 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 20 and 35.
View Profile
Es79
I'm a 34 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 18 and 30.
View Profile
adonikam
I'm a 66 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 50 and 65.
View Profile
loverboyyenu
I'm a 40 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 27 and 45.
View Profile
makano
I'm a 33 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 18 and 40.
View Profile
Thabo526
I'm a 32 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 28 and 45.
View Profile
adiedee
I'm a 49 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 27 and 45.
View Profile
2282B
I'm a 47 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 29 and 37.
View Profile
paris1988
I'm a 25 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 18 and 29.
View Profile
KeepTrying
I'm a 64 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 34 and 55.
View Profile
nihurt
I'm a 58 year old man looking to meet women between the ages of 45 and 60.
View Profile

Business Directory