Tuning gurus Rob and Steve Green at RG Motorsport in Johannesburg are famous for 'street sleepers' - cars that look pretty well standard until the lights change and they leave you coughing in a cloud of rubber smoke.
Then, once in a while they do one that comes at you with both fists swinging, like this in-your-face Audi S4 quattro with seri-aas rims, aero kit at both ends and signature Ed Hardy paint job.
But the really tasty stuff is under the bonnet: this supercharged, three-litre V6 beastie is good for 287kW (compared to the standard 245), good enough to shred the 100km/h sprint in less than five seconds - half a second quicker than Audi's 5.4 second sea level claim.
Acceleration to 160km/h (that's thev old-fashioned non-metric 'ton') requires only 10.7 seconds, the quarter-mile comes up in about 13.1 and a standing kilometre takes just 23.5 seconds, with a terminal velocity of 231km/h - and all those numbers are do-able at Gauteng altitude without intermediate rubber or slicks.
HOW’D THEY DO THAT?
With precise ignition and fuel timing, thanks to the wizardry of the Unichip Q, that allows the tuner to tailor electronic signals en route to the spark plugs and injectors, and optimise their settings across the rev range, under load, in a simulated environment.
The second key ingredient is Torco race fuel concentrate, along with a separate, driver-activated map that advances the ignition (only possible thanks to the increased octane rating of the Torco-enriched fuel) when the switch is flicked.
Lastly, a dual 63mm Techniflo stainless-steel exhaust system - computer-designed and fabricated in the company's Randburg workshop - breathes out through four fist-sized chromed tips, speaking with commanding authority when pushed hard.
Like we said, in your face, china.
This Stage 1 conversion for the Audi S4 (or S5) costs R26 500, including RGMotorsport's six month or 20 000km warranty. Of course, that’s over and above the standard Audi S4’s price of R620 000.