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She was not allowed to see the charred remains of her daughter.
And she has not summoned the courage to visit the spot on a Magaliesburg farm where the 16-year-old schoolgirl’s remains were found.
But, on Wednesday, Shireen de Waal will hear as a forensic pathologist divulges details of how her daughter was burnt – possibly even revealing if the schoolgirl was burnt alive or after she was killed.
“I will be there tomorrow. It’s very traumatic for me at this stage anyway. With my daughter (Louise’s older sister) by my side, I’ll be okay,” the woman, who had broken down while testifying in court on Monday, said on Tuesday.
Clutching pictures of her daughter’s remains close to her chest, she had wept loudly, prompting Judge Sita Kolbe to ask the prosecuting team if they did not need a short adjournment.
“My life is shattered. I can’t cope. I can’t function. My heart is broken. I’m on medication,” said De Waal.
Since her daughter’s death in October, she has lost her job and is now on the verge of losing her home as she has no source of income.
“My life has changed dramatically. I lost my job… now I’m losing my house,” she said.