Sometimes headlines make the headlines

Eskom chief executive Brian Molefe File picture: Simphiwe Mbokazi

Eskom chief executive Brian Molefe File picture: Simphiwe Mbokazi

Published Dec 5, 2016

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Sadly, Brian Molefe's will only be remembered for a shebeen trip, writes Denis Beckett.

Borrowing James Clarke’s acclaimed Stoep trick of “getting the readers to do the work”, thanks, Francois, for a distinctive headline that I “should have included”.

“Woman in sumo wrestler suit assaulted her ex-girlfriend in gay pub after she waved at man dressed as a Snickers bar”.

That headlined the Sydney Daily Telegraph’s account of a 2013 Dublin court case.

Google shows that many see this as a new classic. Different strokes for different okes; to me it’s a crib of Nudist Welfare Man‘s Model Wife, less elegant, less grammatical , and trying a bit too hard.

Come to “ARMY VEHICLE DISAPPEARS", also much cited, together with its highlighted first paragraph saying that the vehicle was in Australian army camouflage.

To me, Angie, sorry to say, this is a headline that missed the boat. If the sub-editor had found CAMOUFLAGE CAR LOST, that would be a different story.

Hmm, I see one reason that James got more readers doing his work than I ever managed.

He’s a diplomatic fellow who didn’t dump on his suppliers. How sad has been the implosion of Brian Molefe.

In the depressing string of “transformed”, which is to say, re-colour-coded, executives who have slid into disgrace leaving damaged institutions behind, here was Superhero making the lights stay on.

If his was not the highest pedestal in the nation, whose was? Which meant the longest fall, and oh dear, no-one ever dug his own hole deeper on the way down, with that shebeen that couldn’t be mentioned for his young wife’s sake. The fall leads logically to superlative number three: the wildest yet lashing-out at a handy scapegoat.

As a rule of thumb, in the case of incumbent executives you can judge how badly they feel they're failing from how loudly they shout the blame-whitey message. When Molefe was riding high we heard zero. But for a fallen executive the temptation is overwhelming. Where I think Brian sets a new record is that he fits 29 whacks at whites into one speech.

Less measurably, it may also be a record in terms of tone, insisting that pale people’s mission in life is to keep dark people down.

Like all them-and-us allegations, this one surely has a kernel. When it was common for white people to fear for their survival you could hear that view, though it was far from a general view or even the general view of Nationalists (whose policy, and some genuinely believed it, was good neighbours). But to find that view now you’d have to be in an asylum.

There is no longer any logic for group fear to counter ordinary humanity. For Brian in his excuse-making to project it as a shared doctrine is disappointingly devious.

I hope Brian will hang on until we are on even keel as a society with a thoroughly shared interest in an economy that works by utilising all its skills.

There’ll be plenty of place for him there, in in-control mode. I have invaded the wrong function. The right one is a block away but I’m not sure whether east or north.

My car is several minutes south. The car guard is a mensch.

He approaches me, enquires, takes time and trouble, checking with colleagues.

When he gives me confident directions I tell him firmly that I think he is an extremely nice person.

I also say apologies, my cash is in the car’s ashtray.

He says “no, no, your words have lifted me, I need no more”.

* Beckett is a writer and journalist

** The views expressed here are not necessarily those of Independent Media.

The Star

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