Derby went down like a lead balloon

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The Soweto derby is losing its shine, says the writer.

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Cape Town – Do you remember the time when the Miss South Africa pageant was popular and basically brought households to a standstill?

I remember a time when the whole family would rock up at our house to watch the finalists strut their stuff at Sun City. And everybody would have their favourite, while my cousins would always say “there are better looking women in Upington than this Miss Northern Cape. They don’t call it Mooi Meisie Fontein for nothing”.

My mom would bake plenty of goodies, and we would sit riveted to our small television screen for the next two hours to see who would be crowned as South Africa’s most beautiful woman. In the 90s, I could name you each Miss South Africa from Anneline Kriel to Amy Kleinhans, and who they were dating. But yesterday, I didn’t even know the current holder of the crown until I googled it.

I found that Miss South Africa is the lovely Marilyn Ramos, a pretty girl with a charming personality and a bright mind no doubt. But the only reason I tried to find out who she was, was for the purposes of this column.

I needed Miss Ramos’s help to illustrate what could become of the Soweto derby if we don’t take care of it.

There was a kiddies party at my place on Saturday afternoon, and I was in charge of inflating the balloons. But I managed to escape between 3pm and 5pm to watch Kaizer Chiefs and Orlando Pirates go at it. It was a game I was looking forward to for weeks.

However, blowing up the balloons would have been much more fun than the hesitant and stuttering performances we saw in South African football’s showpiece match.

What makes me even sadder is that the world tuned in to watch the match. But most of the world probably changed the channel soon after ... I know I wanted to.

The Soweto derby is still South Africa’s most-watched sports event. It was also South Africa’s most exciting sports event. But it’s becoming the country’s dullest sporting event. It doesn’t help that there is an overkill of derbies in meaningless pre-season tournaments for money-making purposes.

The derby is supposed to be sacred, a football match every young kid wants to play in. Saturday afternoon was supposed to be one of those great days when a nation glanced at the television sets, scared even to blink an eye. But it was a snore fest of note, two hours of our lives we will never get back.

It’s a shame that I had to google to find out who Miss South Africa is. I just hope in future I don’t find myself with my phone in my hand, googling: “Soweto derby score” after searching for “lowest price for helium balloons in Paarl”. – Cape Times

TWEETS OF THE WEEK

@piersmorgan (the diehard Arsenal man puts things in perspective): BREAKING NEWS: 2nd Pope elected since Arsenal last won a trophy. #whitesmoke

@DietmarHamann (the former Liverpool man on Arsenal’s team for their Champions League match against Bayern Munich): Looks like Wenger is resting player against Munich to keep them fresh for Swansea. Used to be the other way round. Where did it all go wrong?

WHO TO FOLLOW

@dembabafoot: Found out if he knows why his Chelsea teammate Fernando Torres can’t hit a barn door from five yards out at the moment.

* Follow John Goliath on Twitter: @JohnGoliath82

* Send us your views – john.goliath@inl.co.za