From Steve Jobs and Walt Disney, to Pablo Picasso and even the man who walked on water Himself... Kanye West has certainly always held high ambitions (or serious delusions) about his position on the totem pole of life. So why not US president, too?
Would that such a notion were simply another in a long line of Yeezy-isms, fuelled by his infamously ocean-sized ego. But if Kanye’s rambling discourse during this past weekend’s VMAs is to be believed, the rapper turned producer and fashion designer has his sights set on his very own West Wing. (See what I did there?)
While political pundits may turn up their noses at such a seemingly preposterous notion, they would do well not to ignore the juggernaut that is the KW brand.
After all, in an age where a nest-haired, thrice divorced, thrice bankrupted billionaire, who brazenly declares all Mexicans to be drug-pedalling rapist criminals, and makes embarrassingly inappropriate allusions to female reporters’ monthly cycles, can be regarded as a serious contender for the Oval Office, why not “a jackass”?
(As Obama once referred to Kanye, post his now notorious onstage rant targeting Taylor Swift at the very same music awards six years ago…)
Of course, where The Donald does have proven business acumen and well-placed political connec-tions already in his pocket, Kanye’s only legislative experience to date basically entails branding George W Bush a racist for his handling of the Katrina crisis. But so what?
So what if ‘he who would be prez’ made his declaration after admitting he had “smoked a little something to take the edge off”? (A confidence-inspiring prelude to how he would handle crisis situations as the leader of the free world: unsure whether to launch those missiles? Lemme smoke some weed and think on it bro…)
So what if his powers of persuasion, public speaking and negotiation would entail spewing out maundering sentences where virtually every second word requires an asterisk to block out the volley of expletives? Ultimately, it ain’t about him; it’s about new ideas bro… people with ideas, people who believe in truth bro (quote, unquote).
So what if Kanye’s unofficial bid for the presidency entailed bold statements like “we’re not gonna control our kids with brands”, while he and wifey Kim Kardashian brazenly splurge $2 million-plus ensuring their daughter is always decked out in designer gear? (Because heaven forbid a two-year-old should have to step out in anything other than bespoke couture.)
On the subject of Mrs West, should her baby daddy succeed in his bid to become Commander-in-Chief, America will be blessed with a First Lady whose selfie-snapping and shameless self-promotion skills could see her double up as White House photographer and publicist. What a great way to cut back on taxpayer spending!
And hey, where campaign slogans are concerned, this fabulously frivolous twosome needn’t take too much time from their label-totting, plastic surgery procedures, sexy home video-producing schedules to think on it. They can simply borrow from Barack Obama:
West for president? Yes he Kan...
LARA DE MATOS
TONIGHT EDITOR