TODAY is April 1, but this is no joke. There are massive changes afoot for M-Net and DStv viewers, and I – normally stubbornly resistant to change of any kind – am very excited.
First of all, M-Net terrestrial and M-Net satellite are going to be different. Since those who have DStv already have a range of children’s and sport channels to watch, that programming is going to fall away leaving a much better entertainment line-up. M-Net terrestrial will still carry feeds from Supersport and Kyknet.
They say it’s to “meet the specific needs of subscribers and to eradicate the duplication of content on the M-Net channels on DStv” and it makes me extremely happy not to have sport interrupting my stories anymore.
This is an example of just one day in the two new lives of M-Net, namely this coming Monday. On DStv we begin with the Australian Wipeout at 7am. This programme, which can be seen in multiple versions on various channels, fascinates me. A full hour of watching people fall in mud and water, and having their heads bashed? It take all sorts.
The day continues with The Talk, movies, series (Rita Rocks, Desperate Housewives), Carte Blanche and American Idol. At 6pm the new soap, The Wild, begins. There’s been a lot of hype on air, but as of a week before broadcast, nothing concrete from the publicity department. What I can tell you is that it “will be set on a stretch of land that is home to a five-star game lodge, where emotions will run amok” and the “high-end, HD production, which will be filmed entirely on location, promises to be filled with drama, passion, feisty characters, wild animals and magnificent South African scenery”.
It’s going to be tough to follow the long-running Egoli, but let’s wait and see.
At 6.30pm Masterchef Australia begins and will run in this timeslot every weekday. Then it’s Grey’s Anatomy, The Good Wife, season five of Brothers & Sisters (9.30pm), followed by more movies, Carte Blanche, a repeat of Wipeout at 5am, and a little bit of children’s programming in the early hours of the morning. There will be a Masterchef omnibus on Saturdays from 1pm till 5pm and The Wild on Sundays from 7am till 9am.
M-Net terrestrial: Supersport from 7am till 11am, a movie, then Rita Rocks, followed by Kyknet from 1pm till 5pm. From then until 7am it’s the same as M-Net satellite except for an hour of Kyknet between 6.30pm and 7.30pm (so no Masterchef). For more info on this you can see forum.dstv.com/showthread.php?t=11115
Now for the part that is making me dance a little jig of joy – from today M-Net Action becomes a dedicated movie channel and all its shows move to M-Net Series, including new seasons of some of my favourites, which is going to make it possibly one of the best channels to watch right now.
To make room for them, almost all the reality programming is moving to Vuzu. Project Runway has already started there, and will be joined by She’s Got the Look, The Bachelorette, The Bachelor, Wife Swap, Real Housewives of the Orange County, Real Housewives of New Jersey and Shear Genius. Top Chef and Top Chef Masters stay on Series as they are contractually obliged. Season five of Top Chef (Tuesdays at 9.30pm) ends on April 12 and will be followed directly by season six, and Top Chef Masters is on Saturdays at 7.30pm and runs until May 7. We “may get” season two, according to the publicity people, and maybe even Top Chef Desserts.
The good stuff starts from this very night – and I cannot tell you what a pleasure it will be to have decent shows to watch (or record, as the case may be) on a Friday night. There’s always such a big gap over the weekends.
The second season of Parenthood is at 8.30pm, and the third season of Sons of Anarchy at 9.30pm. After Jax’s son was kidnapped, the story picks up just days later and immediately assaults you with hardcore action and drama. Tip: do not click on season three on the Wikipedia page. There are spoilers.
A new season of The Closer begins on Tuesday at 7.30pm, season two of Hawthorne on April 10 (5.30pm) and the long-awaited (for me, anyway) season six of Criminal Minds on April 11 at 8.30pm. Breaking Bad’s fourth season was supposed to start on April 13 at 7.30pm, but instead we’re getting season seven of House which is not a bad second prize really, and it has been ages since we’ve seen the cantankerous doctor. Although you can get your fix on Universal channel daily, which is screening season three and, completely illogically, two episodes of season four on Fridays. It is impossible to watch both at the same time because the back stories are so strong and so relevant.
Also beginning on April 13, at 9.30pm, is season four of Eureka. The fourth season of Burn Notice arrives the following night at 7.30pm, and the second season of V at 9.30pm on April 19. A new series, Memphis Beat, begins on April 27 at 8.30pm, which revolves around Dwight Hendricks, “a quirky Memphis police detective with an intimate connection to the city, a passion for blues music and a close relationship with his mother”. It stars Jason Lee (My Name Is Earl), and has been picked up for a second season.
All of this, along with existing series like Dark Blue and Justified as well as what’s on M-Net means my social life is going to become rather curtailed this month. I hope I don’t wear out the PVR.
As for Action, there will be premiere movies at 8pm, and this month there is a Samuel L Jackson festival which includes The Negotiator, Shaft and Basic.
For more on the new schedules see beta.mnet.co.za/mnetseries/ or beta.mnet.co.za/MnetAction/ and note that the schedules in the April issue of Dish and in other publications could be incorrect.