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• Pics: going crazy in China       

The man standing at the front of the bus smiles widely. “My name is Robert,” he says. “But you can call me Bruce Lee. Because I am your tour guide, but I’m also your body guard.”

This was our welcome speech from the man who was going to show us some of the most famous of Beijing’s sites. For Robert Ren, six years of working as a tour guide means he has visited the Great Wall over 1 000 times and a sense of humour helps him see it all again with a smile.

Just a day before, we had been welcomed to the People’s Republic of China by the Beijing Capital International Airport, the second busiest passenger airport in the world. On arrival, passengers are herded into an underground train, which bridges the 7km between terminal three and the rest of the airport. It was a high speed welcome to the world’s new superpower.

Ren warned us: it would be hard to balance visiting of some of Beijing’s world famous ancient sites, such as an extremely long wall – said to be the only human-made object visible from space –and a palace with enough room for 2000 concubines.

“Perhaps the men in our group will have the time to see the Forbidden City and Tienanmen Square as they won’t be as busy shopping as the women,” Ren joked.

He wasn’t far off the truth. Somehow I bought three handbags, but missed both the city and the square.

But the 20 million residents of this Chinese capital seem stuck in a similar befuddlement. Beijing is the transport hub of China and the place all major Chinese businesses keep their offices. Two-year-old children in ripoff Ugg boots use iPhones as toys and shiny highrise buildings twist and turn against the frozen sky. The young and up and coming are drawn like moths from other cities into the capital’s high energy streets.

On the streets are bicycles, one of the symbols of China before its industrial revolution, when pedalling was the only affordable mode of transportation. But modern day Chinese bicycles are electric and have tiny engines and heated gloves to protect the hands of their riders. Pedestrians strolling the streets wear Hello Kitty face masks to protect themselves from the pollution caused by the high population.

Despite all these modern day accessories, the highrises remain neighbours with the ancient. I’s as in Taoism, a religion that has a strong influence on Chinese culture, yin must be balanced with yang. As with the sun being balanced by the moon, or meat being balanced by vegetables; in Beijing, modernisation is balanced by remainants of the ancient.

That said, five million cars roam the roads of Beijing. This is a city with crazier traffic than Johannesburg. Although the neat yellow and ever-green taxis are not the dented beasts of our CBD, their driving is just as predatory. Side mirrors are neglected as they swerve in and out between bicycles and buses.

The locals talk about traffic in hushed tones as if it’s some feared demi-god, whose ebbs and flows must be obeyed. And with due merit. A South African living in the city told me that western residents in Beijing hire drivers, as they are too afraid to take to the wheel alone. One of my travel companions reported being brought home from a Beijing night club by a driver so drunk, he was half slumped against the wheel and heaved as he took the corners.

The Chinese have a saying: “When Beijing is safe, the whole of China is safe”, because it is the city’s capital. Nine hundred years ago, Beijing was choosen as the country’s capital in part because of it being strategically placed to keep out enemies. Thus it is very close to the Great Wall of China, built for protection of China’s northern border. Ironically, that which once kept enemies out, now draws tourists in. Stretching almost 9 000km, its construction goes back to the 5th century BC and it was completed at the end of the Ming dynasty in the 16th century.

Countless Chinese died while building the wall and it became a symbol of war and death for families that were broken up as their husbands and sons were sent to the wall for years at end. The bodies of the dead were simply used as extra building material for the wall.

Although parts of the wall have decayed, it is still mighty and powerful. No one in our group was prepared for its steepness. So steep, in fact, it should be renamed the Great Stairs of China. It’s potentially the best workout of your life, as each time you reach a milestone you just want to keep climbing and climbing. Take a picnic lunch and flat shoes.

But the wall is not the only example of ambitious Chinese building. The Ming Dynasty Tombs, which contain the 13 emperors of the Ming Dynasty, are large underground temples, all built by human hands between the 14th and the 17th centuries. Only one tomb has been opened, Emperor Dingling’s tomb, with some controversy because during the Cultural Revolution which started in 1966, Chinese leader Mao Zedong ordered the destruction of many of the tomb’s precious artifacts and burning of the emperor and his empress’s bodies. The tomb remains an architectural feat, beginning 27m underground ... but proposals to excavate further tombs remain unapproved.

Also a product of the Ming Dynasty is the biggest imperial palace in the world, the Forbidden City. It is reputed to have 9 999.5 rooms and space for 2 000 concubines.

“With 2000 concubines you can’t remember their names,” Ren pauses, holding back a laugh, “only their numbers.”

According to Chinese legend, when the palace was built the emperor built 10 000 rooms. But the Jade Emperor, an important Taoist god, told the emperor that his own palace in heaven had 10 000 rooms, and an emporer was not allowed to have the same number of rooms in his palace as God. So the emporer removed one room and replaced it with a half room. But how does one create half a room? Simple. A room has four pillars. A room with six pillars is one and a half rooms.

As famous as China’s ancient architecture, is the country’s jade and silk. Jade is sacred and virtuous, a thing of beauty and purity in Chinese culture. For the Chinese, while metals like gold can be given a value, jade is invaluable and they wear pendants and bracelets of the stone and adorn their homes with jade statues.

Trade in silk from China has stretched across centuries. The string from a single silk worm can be up to 1 600m long – and is the backbone of the original “made in China” product, silk. Little changed since the days os the ancient Silk Route, silk fabrics, duvets and sheets continue to be produced and, at the model silk factory in Beijing, you receive a lively demonstration of how the process works.

The only potential disappointment in Beijing is the food. Famed for its Peking Duck, don’t go to Beijing expecting traditional Chinese food to taste like the Chow Mein (which is an American-Chinese dish) from your local Kung Fo Kitchen. Many of the dishes are unrecognisable to the non-Asian eye. We were served fish, so thickly coated in a brown sauce that it looked like it was killed in a nuclear disaster. Odd gelatin cubes floated in a yellow liquids, indistinguishable meats swam in sauces and a greasy crab cried for help from its fried enclosure. Also, in traditional Chinese food, there are no separate courses so you can pick up a pastry covered ball, assuming it's a savory pie only to have a sickly sweet surprise.

At lunch, one of the ladies pointed out a meat slice covered by a fatty looking substance. “What's that?” she asked Ren. He replied, “Pork.” “It doesn't look like pork,” she said. “Well its a mixture of pork and beef,” he said. After a few gasps and whispers of “Maybe it's dog” Ren confessed. “The truth is I don't like Chinese food,” he said, “I prefer McDonald’s.”

If You Go...

Since last month SAA does three direct flights weekly between Johannesburg and Beijing. Flights take 14 and a half hours and range in price depending on the season.

Within the CBD signs are demarcated in Mandarin and English, however language can be a problem as many residents do not speak English. Keep a piece of paper on you with the address of your hotel wirtten in Mandarin incase you get lost.

Taxi's are cheap and the recommended method of transport for tourists as public transport is difficult to navigate without Mandarin

Weather is extreme and will average at 30C in summer and can go as low as -15C in winter. - Saturday Star

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