Bianca Coleman
HOLIDAY EsCape Times aims to cover a wide variety of activities. Some are leisurely and quite civilised, like going to the theatre, or drinking tea and looking at art. Others require a mixture of recklessness and courage. They are always fun, but some might say – and by some I mean I – taking a six-year-old out for the day is the ultimate extreme sport.
Since the fruit of my own loins is a grown man, my friend lent me her daughter for the day. Entertaining a small child is not like riding a bicycle; you do not always remember how to do it. When do they eat? Are they toilet trained? How long does it take for them to get tired? And does sugar really put them on a manic high? I was terrified; her mother thought it was hilarious.
Bella Buckland was delivered to my doorstep with her Hello Kitty backpack containing a change of clothes (always sensible) and only two rules laid down by Mom. Number one, Bianca is in charge (wonderful), and number two, have fun (even better). We had a full day planned, which began with the Snow Park at Canal Walk. This story will appear in next Tuesday’s edition.
From there we headed to GrandWest Entertainment World. Yes, there is a casino – and there will be a grownup story about that too – but it’s so much more. There are restaurants and fast food outlets (a differentiation has to be made), cinemas, an ice rink, a bowling alley, bars, and live entertainment venues from intimate to massive enough to host some of the biggest international names in comedy and music.
While I can in no way personally condone the actions of parents who leave their children in the day care facility while they gamble, there are lots of activities that you can enjoy with your child. Over the festive season there is free fun stuff to do – face painting, magic shows, Christmas arts and crafts, juggling, drumming, stilt-walking, story-telling, balloon twisting, break dancers, a ballerina, a cartoonist, a hula hoop dancer, cookie decoration, and visits by Father Christmas in the week leading up to Christmas Day.
There will also be appearances by a host of characters such as the fun Traffic Officer (who doesn’t exist in my world), Marilyn Monroe, Charlie Chaplin and Laurel and Hardy.
Bella’s mom had given me a rule of my own: please don’t take her ice skating. Only because she wanted to take Bella herself. But unfortunately, the mini ice rink for younger children was smack bang en route to our destination, The Magic Castle. No mule could have dug its heels in harder or more firmly. “Pleeeeeeeease, oh please can I ice skate?” she begged. No one had warned me about this part.
I managed to postpone the decision by distracting her with a go in the X Rider. It’s just a few very intense minutes in a 3-D/4-D capsule which should not be attempted with a hangover. It’s amazing how real it feels as you hurtle along rollercoasters, and other special effects. Next to me, Bella was squealing with delight.
In The Magic Castle, she rode the carousel, the real rollercoaster, and many other rides. As each ended, the arms folded and the frown descended, but sunshine and smiles were quickly restored with the next attraction.
We played some games in the arcade, winning miles of ticket tokens which we exchanged for a fake tattoo, a bouncy rubber ball, and a lollipop with dipping sherbet.
The question of when six-year-olds get hungry never came up because I gave in first; we headed to Bella Gina – so chosen this day for its name – for delicious wood-fired pizzas, and cooling milkshakes. Naturally we passed the ice rink again.
Long story short, Bella skated for the first time. She loved it. I sat on the sidelines and stressed every time she slipped. How would I explain returning this precious package all bloody and toothless? “Bianca!” she yelled on her way past, “please can I have candy floss when I’m finished skating?”
Sure thing, honeybun, I said. I’m not the one who’s going to have to put you to bed later. I needn’t have worried about that either; she passed clean out in the backseat of the car, half-eaten candy floss instinctively held safely aloft. Mission accomplished.
l GrandWest, 1 Vanguard Drive, Goodwood. Telephone 021 505 7777. All other info: www.suninternational.com/GRANDWEST/Pages/default.aspx
l Some Holiday EsCape Times activities are sponsored by the suppliers.