The scenario is one familiar to many dog owners. You return home from work and discover jagged holes in your favourite slippers - but you can’t stay angry at your pet for long.
His guilty slouch quickly wins your forgiveness because, you tell yourself, he knows what he has done and is now feeling genuinely guilty.
In fact, his behaviour has nothing to do with remorse. As the world’s best-known pack animals, dogs are expert communicators and these submissive signals are their way of avoiding conflict with those further up the hierarchy.
This willingness to stand down is something which humans should try a little more often, according to Ryan O’Meara, author of an unusual new self-help book which suggests that our most faithful companions can teach us much about finding happiness and fulfilment.
“Dogs know that life is too precious to go into battle over something trivial,” he says. “But people do it all the time. We argue with our neighbours over parking near our house even when there are spaces down the road. If we lost that petty pride, we’d get more done and waste less time - and the world would be a better place.”
If the idea that we should learn this and other life lessons from dogs seems far fetched, consider this conundrum. There are many kinds of domestic animals, but when did you last hear cats or hamsters being described as Man’s Best Friend?
“Logically, that title should go to members of the ape family, who are, after all, only a few chromosomes away from being us,” says O’Meara.
“But we don’t refer to chimps in this way, and we don’t have boarding kennels, grooming parlours and training schools all over the world looking after people’s pet monkeys.”
Dogs certainly do seem to have their paws firmly under our tables - which leads O’Meara to claim that they are “the world’s most successful animals”.
So if living a “dog’s life” really is something to be desired, what else can you learn from the guru who, even as you read this, is probably snoozing comfortably at your feet?
Making friends
Surveys suggest that the thing people value most about their dogs is the welcome they get whenever they come home. We are glad to see dogs because they are glad to see us.
This seems obvious, yet in our human-to-human interactions we frequently fail to let those close to us know how much we care for them.
“How many times have you left a friend after spending time with them and thought, ‘That was great, we should see each other more often’, and yet never thought to say how much you value them?” asks O’Meara.
“Of course, it’s hard to rival the dog’s wagging tail, eager eyes and joyful barks when it comes to expressing affection, but even a smile that says ‘I like you, you make me happy’ can make a difference.”
Keeping friends
Without his beloved canine sidekick Peritas, Alexander the Great might well have been Alexander the Average. When the formidable Greek leader was overwhelmed by the army of Persia’s Darius III in 333 BC, the loyal mastiff leapt up and bit the lip of an elephant that was charging his master.
This saved Alexander’s life and made possible the immortal conquests without which Western civilisation as we know it might have been immeasurably different.
Dogs have been the favoured pets of the rich and powerful ever since. Many of America’s presidents have owned them - the country’s latest First Canine is a Portuguese Water Dog named Bo; while some of today’s celebrities appear to regard their dogs as their best friends.
O’Meara says there’s a reason why dogs have always found a place at the side of the most prominent figures in society.
“These people are often unable to distinguish true friends and those who are using them for their own ends,” he points out. “In dogs, we find true and faithful companions, who love you whether you are a vagrant living under a bridge or the richest person in the world.”
This has given them a unique place in our society.
“As humans, we can also find our own rewards by choosing friends we really like, and always behaving towards them in a genuine and honest way - just like dogs do.”
Trust your instincts
Dogs are exceptionally good at making rapid and very good decisions based on their gut instincts.
“During the 2004 South Asian tsunami, dogs that lived on the beaches in the affected area began running inland long before the first waves hit,” says O’Meara. “They were way ahead of even the weather forecasters, and they didn’t hesitate to act on what they felt.
“We see the same thing in sniffer dogs, who signal to their owner the moment they get a whiff of drugs or explosives.”
Humans have good intuition too - yet in many areas of life we tune out our gut instincts.Think of the TV quiz show Who Wants To Be a Millionaire? Often you know the answer as soon as the question is asked, but then three other options appear on the screen alongside the right one and suddenly you begin questioning your initial response.
“We are so paralysed by this constant over-analysis that we frequently end up making poor decisions,” says O’Meara.
Indeed, he believes this is what led to the worldwide credit crunch in 2008. “Those in charge of our financial institutions were so caught up in what they were doing that they didn’t stop to question whether lending large amounts of money to people who were unlikely to be able to repay it was a good idea.
“If dogs - or at least people with dog-like decision-making - had been in charge, it might very well not have happened.”
He points out that successful military leaders such as Caesar, Napoleon and General Patton were all known for their willingness to make big decisions very quickly.
“Remember that your first instincts are, in many cases, the right ones. Do what dogs do and learn to trust them.”
Take the lead
Some humans seem to think that being an effective boss is all about Basil Fawlty-style shouting and bullying. But, according to O’Meara, they should look at the behaviour of alpha males in dog packs.
“Alpha males are often the calmest, quietest and most docile members of the pack - the ones most likely to put up with nonsense from puppies. But they carry themselves with a certain confidence, which commands respect, and they maintain their position by being consistent, trustworthy and leading by example.
“An alpha male would never ask another dog to do something he wouldn’t do himself. By contrast, human bosses often say one thing and do another, and leave their staff feeling let down.
“If we show those who place their faith in us that it will always be repaid, then we should never have to prove ourselves by being aggressive and overtly dominant.”
Be dogged
The ancestors of both humans and dogs knew that in order to survive they had to solve problems such as where to find food or how to evade predators.
Finding the answers was a matter of life or death, and laboratory studies suggest that dogs are still hard-wired to keep worrying at something until they have resolved it. It’s no wonder that we still use the word “dogged” to describe such tenacity.
“Adopting the same ‘at all costs’ approach as dogs might just make us better problem-solvers,” he says.
Live a dog’s life
One of the most remarkable stories to come out of the recent Japanese earthquake concerned a group of children who had survived for days in the rubble of a building.
“It later emerged that they had passed the time with games like counting drips of water and this focus on the present moment, rather than on what had happened to them, is what kept them going,” says O’Meara, adding that this is “exactly how dogs approach life”.
If we want to be as happy as canines, he suggests that we try to live in the here and now, breaking our days down into many enjoyable and worry-free moments.
“Persevere and you’ll see that life doesn’t feel so bad,” he says. “After all, if you have good health, food and shelter, then everything else is a bonus.” - Daily Mail
* Clever Dog by Ryan O’Meara is published by Veloce Publishing.