How to manage your stress

The key to managing my insomnia has been to realise that it doesn't matter if I don't sleep, just so long as I don't worry about it and become physically tense.

The key to managing my insomnia has been to realise that it doesn't matter if I don't sleep, just so long as I don't worry about it and become physically tense.

Published Oct 6, 2014

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As someone who has suffered two breakdowns and battled with depression, you might wonder why I offer guidance on how to stay sane.

But it is precisely because I have known the deep anguish of several depressive episodes that I now believe I have my “black dog” on a firm lead. I would be lying if I didn’t admit that I have moments of despair, but I’ve never revisited the kind of severe depression that saw me hospitalised and considering suicide.

Recovery has required resilience and old-fashioned hard work – not to mention two psychiatrists, several GPs, three therapists and numerous psychological courses. But I’ve left no stone unturned in developing my own strategies, too.

I routinely practise these guidelines, but never more so than when I feel that depression is returning. The first clue is insomnia – now I am alert should I have trouble dropping off, staying asleep or a tendency to wake early. The second is when instead of moving on from life’s vicissitudes, I begin to obsess. And thirdly, physical signs appear: a racing heart, breathlessness and feeling sick. Then I know it’s time for my stay-sane tips.

Start with breathing

Paying attention to your breathing is a brilliant way to root yourself in the present. Depression is characterised by worry about the future and regret about the past. Anxiety tends to make your breathing shallow and fast, but by forcing yourself to inhale and exhale more slowly, your body is forced to calm down.

Quick tip: Put a finger over one of your nostrils. This will halve the speed at which you breathe. Pretend you’ve got a cold.

Cut out alcohol

After initially raising the levels of the neuro-transmitters in our brain that tell us to feel happy, drinking depletes them. This is why our mood is low during a hangover.

Act generously

Noble deeds make us more forgiving of others, and therefore more forgiving of ourselves (see tip 5). I’m lucky enough to do voluntary work at my local prison, and I always leave feeling better.

Manage insomnia

The key to managing my insomnia has been to realise that it doesn’t matter if I don’t sleep, just so long as I don’t worry about it and become physically tense. I use techniques that have taught me to relax one muscle group at a time. It isn’t medically possible to stay awake for ever.

Be compassionate

Healing mantras act as a balm for my hurt mind: “My strength is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9) and “You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here” (Max Ehrmann’s Desiderata). I stick these on my bathroom mirror and use them in moments of everyday adversity. – Daily Mail

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