London - Madonna has never been one to dress her age. In tiny leather hotpants at the Met Gala afterparty in New York recently, commentators were left wondering whether she’d stepped out in her teenage daughter’s clothes.
The 56-year-old queen of pop may be used to pushing sartorial barriers, but in this instance she is not alone. For the latest curious trend to hit British women’s wardrobes is the cult of the pre-teen hand-me-up.
Put simply, mothers are rifling through their daughters’ wardrobes to borrow their clothes.
It’s a trend that’s arisen from two seemingly diametrically opposed factors. On the one hand, children seem to be growing up faster than ever before. Recent studies have found that, on average, girls are now hitting puberty at age ten.
Meanwhile, many mums are working harder than ever to stay youthful and slim.
Here, mothers and daughters who are on the receiving and the giving end of hand-me-up clothes reveal all …
I DON'T PAY VAT!
Michal Maslin, 35, an events organiser, lives in Salford, Greater Manchester, with her husband Benny, 36, a businessman, and their children Layla, 11, Rebecca, nine, Jacob, seven, and Zak, four.
Michal says:
There’s no question that children are developing at a much younger age. I’m 5ft 4in and Layla is only a few inches shorter than me. But then my husband Benny is 6ft tall.
She is also very mature for her age. She has a keen interest in fashion, and on Sundays we often go shopping together.
It’s through shopping together that I started to wear her hand-me-ups. I’d buy things for Layla, and find myself trying them on, too. I’m a size 6 in lots of stores and my waist is 24in, which makes it easy to wear children’s clothes.
It’s not unusual for me to bring clothes home for both of us and to want to wear the ones for Layla. I think girls’ clothes are much more feminine than adult women’s clothes.
The items can be quite well made, and there’s no VAT on children’s clothes. So why buy a leather jacket from a womenswear shop when you can get it so much cheaper in a children’s shop?
The other week, I bought a gorgeous black leatherette skirt in a children’s boutique. I gave it to Layla but found myself wearing it more than her.
The other great advantage of wearing children’s clothes is that none of my friends wear the same thing. I chuckle to myself when my friends clash - as two did recently when they both turned up at a party wearing the same dress.
Children’s clothes have changed so much from when I was little. My mom, who is 69 and still super-glamorous, was a fashion designer and always bought me stuff from smart children’s boutiques. But they were clearly children’s clothes: little pink blouses or pretty frocks. She wouldn’t have touched them!
Now, you wouldn’t even know I was wearing children’s clothes.
Layla says:
I love the Ted Baker children’s range - it’s always so feminine and pretty. The problem is that Mom loves it, too. I keep reminding her that there’s a Ted Baker range for her age, as well.
Whenever I can’t find something of mine, I know it’ll be in her wardrobe. I can almost tell when she is about to pinch something of mine, just by the way she looks at it.
One of my favourite sweaters is a grey one with little pearls which I got from River Island and which is aged ten. I absolutely love it, but I have to fight Mom for it.
The other day, I came in from school and she was walking down the stairs in a denim shirt that she’d bought for me and I hadn’t even worn yet.
I said: ‘Hang on, that’s mine!’ But she just laughs it off.
Mum is so slim and can make one of my outfits look really trendy with high heels or a funky jacket. But I don’t want to follow her yet. It’s bad enough she pinches my stuff, I don’t want to copy her style, too.
IT'S OUR IN JOKE
Nina Statman, 38, a nurse, lives in Leeds with her fiancé Chris, an IT consultant, and their children Millie, ten, and George, three.
Nina says:
I’ve always really worked hard at staying slim. I do Pilates, push-ups, sit-ups and my old ballet exercises every day, which keeps me a size 6-8.I’m very petite, too - only just over 5ft. So when Millie started to shoot up in height last year, I really noticed the difference. Now, she’s only a few inches shorter than me.
Suddenly, I found myself looking at her wardrobe and realising that I could get into an aged ten to 11 dress.
I don’t always pinch her clothes - sometimes I buy them for myself. I was in M&S looking for a coat for Millie and came out with an age 11 leopardskin fun fur for me.
I’ve even been stopped and asked where my clothes are from - especially when I’m wearing Millie’s lovely grey fleecy Zara coat, which is age 11.
I love it when a friend compliments me on an outfit and I say: ‘Oh, this is one I borrowed from Millie.’ It’s a bit of a standing joke among us.
But I want to keep Millie in children’s clothes for as long as possible. I don’t want her to look like an adult before her time.
Millie says…
The other week, I went into Mom’s bedroom as she was getting ready to go out. I couldn’t believe it when I saw her slipping on a lovely black-and-white dress which Grandma had bought me from Zara’s kids section.
I mean, she looked lovely in it. But I said to her: “That’s my dress! Why are you wearing it?” I wore it the next week for a school disco, but while Mom wore it with heels, I teamed it with jelly shoes.
It happens all the time. Only the other week she wore a lovely pink sweater I got from H&M children’s section for Christmas.
Of course, I realise Mom is super- slim and very dainty. I suppose that’s how she gets away with it.
The thing is, it doesn’t work the other way round as she wants to make sure I dress like a little girl, which causes a few arguments. So even if I could fit into her clothes, I wouldn’t be allowed to wear them.
We’re so smart
Debra Kay, 40, a teacher, lives in Manchester with her husband Ben, 41, a financial controller, and their children Gabriella, 15, Tamara, 12, and Joshua 11.
Debra says:
I look at Tamara sometimes and think, ‘Who is this young lady?’ I wasn’t anything like so well developed at that age. I didn’t have any shape - I was just a washboard.
But I see girls of Tamara’s age all the time looking quite curvy, which still astonishes me.
However, I don’t lose sight of the fact Tamara isn’t a woman; she’s a little girl, whatever her physique. So I want her to dress in clothes which are suited to her age, not her shape. The problem is that I like to look quite smart and traditional, too - which is why I end up pinching Tamara’s clothes.
I used to be much bigger than I am now. I used to weigh 12 st and take a size 14 in clothes.
But a couple of years ago I decided I wanted to lose weight and get in shape, so I took up regular exercise - swimming, using the gym, and cycling - and started to eat more healthily.
Within 18 months I’d lost two stone. I’m now a size 10 and weigh 10st 4lb.
As I got slimmer, so Tamara started to develop physically and it was then that I realised I could wear some of her clothes.
It started with the odd hooded top or pair of jeans. But now I can go into her wardrobe and choose all sorts of outfits. Thankfully, she’s very good about it.
Sometimes I buy her clothes and she doesn’t actually ever get them. I recently found a lovely leopard print dress in the Gok Wan section of Sainsbury’s. It was a size 10 and I thought Tamara would look lovely in it. But she didn’t like the design, so I ended up keeping it.
The only thing about wearing her hand-me-ups is that sometimes Tamara gets upset because she thinks I am slimmer than her. I tell her that she is still growing, and that her body is changing.
Meanwhile, I’m very proud of my beautiful, funny and lively daughter. Sharing clothes - or rather, taking hers - is just another way to cement that bond.
Tamara says:
I never imagined that Mommy and I would share clothes. But in the last year-and-a-half, I think we’ve both changed.
I know I’m growing up - I’m getting curvier - while Mum is slimmer than she’s ever been. It means we can fit into each other’s clothes.
Not that I ever take hers, but she does borrow mine. If she sees something for me and really likes it herself, then she buys two - as she did recently with a lovely pale blue top from Debenhams with buttons down the back.
I’m at the stage when I want to wear young adult clothes. I want to look feminine, I love nice dresses and pencil skirts, and my favourite shops are Primark, H&M and Topshop.
I don’t mind that Mom and I have the same clothes, or that she takes mine. I love her, she’s a fantastic mom. Why wouldn’t I want her to have my hand-me-ups?
Daily Mail