Johannesburg - As the 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children was launched on Thursday, one woman can't come to terms with the way gender-based violence ripped her family apart.
Dikeledi Marawa raised her granddaughter since birth, living with her at her house even after her daughter Dolly Tshabalala got married and went to live elsewhere.
When Tshabalala returned home after she and her husband separated, Marawa’s granddaughter continued to be in her life.
But when Tshabalala was stabbed to death by her boyfriend and former Jozi FM DJ Donald Sebolai last year, Marawa’s idyllic life was shattered.
Not only did she lose her only daughter, she also lost her granddaughter. And her former son-in-law took the little girl to raise her himself.
Marawa hasn't seen her since April, and the pain of missing her deepens every day. “I thought I could console myself with my granddaughter, but I cannot even see her,” she said.
Speaking to The Star outside the court where Sebolai is being sentenced, Marawa said her former son-in-law had asked that he take the little girl to help her forget about what happened to her mother.
The old woman remembers that day clearly.
“It was a cold day and I packed tracksuits and warm things. She was supposed to be there for three weeks, but she has been there since.
“Her birthday is in May, and on that Sunday morning, I called her to wish her a happy birthday before going to church, but he did not answer the phone. I called three times.
“When I returned from church, I called and still could not get hold of the father. The pain I’m feeling is indescribable,” Marawa said.
During Sebolai’s trial on Wednesday in the high court sitting in Palm Ridge, the prosecutor read out Marawa’s victim impact report in which she explained the effect of her daughter’s death on her.
In the report, Marawa said she was separated from her granddaughter.
“Since my daughter’s death, I’m not even allowed to see my granddaughter since the biological father took her. I was very close to her and now I have sleepless nights when I think of her. It would comfort me if I could be allowed to continue bringing her up as I was when the mother was still alive.”
Marawa said in an interview that another thing that hurt her deeply was that her graduate daughter, who was working towards her second degree, died like a “tickeyline (loose woman) from Hillbrow”.
While walking in the court corridor after the case, Marawa approached the family of her daughter’s killer and told them she harboured no ill feelings towards them.
Sebolai’s family were touched by Marawa’s gesture.
They said they had wanted to go and see her but were too scared.
“We even thought of asking the police to accompany us,” Sebolai’s aunt Sinah Sebolai said.
The case was postponed to February 10.
The Star
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