Woman hid ‘sex shame’ for years

Published Aug 2, 2015

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Durban - For years a woman who was sexually molested by a farmer in northern KwaZulu-Natal hid her shame.

But recently, when she heard the man had allegedly raped his 3-year-old granddaughter, she could no longer remain silent.

The woman, who now lives in the Western Cape and is married with children, has laid a charge of sexual assault against the farmer.

“All those years ago, he would always insinuate sex and talk inappropriately. One day, while I was alone on the farm with him, he became aggressive and began to fondle me.

“I fought him off and told my parents I never wanted to return to the farm again, but nobody wanted to believe me. I bottled up my feelings, but now, after hearing about the rape of his granddaughter, I am angry and I do not want to see him get away with it.”

Police spokesman Major Thulani Zwane confirmed the charge as well as the alleged rape of the 3-year -old in May this year.

He said the matter was being investigated by the Estcourt police, which has jurisdiction over the area.

“The matter is still under investigation and no arrests have been made. We are still awaiting a report from the social worker,” Zwane said.

However, for the parents of the little girl the long delays have been frustrating.

Her father told The Sunday Independent in May the child complained to her mother that her genitals were sore.

“The next day my wife went to (her) play school to find out from the principal if something could have gone wrong at school, and we asked her to talk to my daughter to find out what happened,” said the father.

The parents then took the child to a GP and a paediatrician who, independently of each other, confirmed signs of sexual abuse.

“She opened up to the GP, paediatrician and the social worker confessing to them her grandfather was the one who touched her genitals.

“We were in disbelief. I had an amazing relationship with my father and would have never thought he would do this to my child. We were confused but were advised to open a case.

”It was a Friday afternoon and they said they did not have a district surgeon available to examine my child so we had to wait until Monday,” he said.

After that, he immediately opened a protection order for his children, but later that week his father allegedly tried to make contact with the child.

He then opened a case for violation of the protection order, but in spite of this police have taken no further action, he said.

Since then the family have had to attend several examinations and meetings with social workers but no arrests have been made to date.

“We are afraid the justice system is failing us,” said the father.

According to a source who asked not to be identified, other women have since come forward with similar allegations but have not yet provided police with affidavits.

Lobby groups said the incident was an example of how women and children were being let down by the criminal justice system.

Thora Mansfield of the Open Door Crisis Centre said police sometimes failed to follow proper procedures and as a result perpetrators were set free.

“Police should have ensured the little girl was able to see a district surgeon immediately. It seems as though the system has failed these parents and that’s why there have not been any arrests as yet.”

Gender activist Lisa Vetten said it was no longer difficult to prosecute years after an incident.

“If we look at high-profile cases like that of Bob Hewitt, women came forward after more than 30 years and the man was prosecuted.

“Other cases like this should be no different. We can’t have a sex pest on the loose.”

 

Sunday Independent

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