Fear of being ignored on social media

Facebook's Internet.org could deny South Africans quality Internet access, argues the author.

Facebook's Internet.org could deny South Africans quality Internet access, argues the author.

Published Jun 19, 2015

Share

Tweets, posts, blogs and other social media may be a way to connect, share and exchange ideas and opportunities, but can these be linked to a greater human need? The need to feel noticed, interested, important and relevant. The Fear of Being Irrelevant (#FOBI) is more relevant today than ever before.

Jason Ross, a counselling psychologist from Durban, says not only the youth, but people in general harbour a fear of being irrelevant.

“Humans have an instinctive need to feel noticed, connected and a part of something. Today, technology and social media are providing more effective tools for displaying the “self” to the world, the “selfie” being the quintessential example,” said Ross.

“We used to think that the self was something fixed and natural in every person. Psychologists are now starting to view the self as something we inflict on the world.

“When we are young, especially in our teens, we experiment the most with versions of ourselves by acting them out and gauging responses in the hope that we are liked. Today you can even count the ‘likes’ of something you have said or done on social media.”

But, he says, this new ability to author one’s self comes with new challenges that require skills that we do not yet have.

“Two things that come to mind are impulse control and information hygiene. It is easier than ever to act on impulse and simply publish random and potentially irrelevant information. There is also an abundance of information out there, most of it quite arbitrary and lacking any real credibility. Perhaps over time we will learn how to filter this by practising a bit more information hygiene,” he said.

According to a UK research, teenagers 20 years ago strived to be doctors, lawyers and engineers. Today, they strive to be celebrities. They seek fame and fortune over being useful to society.

People at restaurants, movies or shows work with their eyes glued to their phones. Fingers like woodpeckers, tapping away. Why?

Because the #FOBI is real. It’s hard-wired into society.

Nicola Cooper, senior trends analyst in pop culture and lifestyle at Flux Trends, says #FOBI has led to many outlandish, often inappropriate commentaries, images or behaviour including shock tactical acts in order to outdo another in search of acknowledgment.

“Gatekeepers such as Kim Kardashian and Miley Cyrus have served as fuel, innovators and influences, therefore creating a trickle down into general society with the youth attempting to emulate these actions in order to gain viewers, followers, likes and acceptance with an online audience,” she said.

However, she says the trend, driven by social media platforms such as Facebook, YouTube, Twitter and Instagram, is altering with the newer generations such as Generation Z and Generation K denouncing this trend and replacing it with a newer trend called “rendering reality” and #JOMO (Joy of Missing Out).

Cooper said that while most people fear being irrelevant, younger people who have only known the world online, are aware that the projection online is a curated environment. They have denounced this “augmented reality” and replaced the trend with “real time” engagement.

“The concept that our worth or self worth is determined by how many followers, likes or engagements with our audiences, to the point that many have chosen to purchase pseudo followers to increase their social net worth,” she said.

Online photo sharing platform, Instagram, deleted millions of all falsified or pseudo accounts creating chaos in social media platforms in December last year.

Cooper said the pressures created by social media caused a rise in anxiety and compulsive disorders, mainly the need to be informed and acknowledged constantly.

“With a better understanding of the world online, generations Z and K know these fears and anxieties and are choosing deliberately not to engage in the pressures of social media.

“These generations are choosing the route of being relevant by making an actual difference to their society, rather than relying on social media for acknowledgement and are the generations of ‘doing’ rather than ‘documenting’.”

Cooper said this has had a ripple effect in families who have adopted “no device days” and the concept of the “digital detox”, selecting to live in real time and enforce a stricter management of their online time.

“This has resulted in a greater desire for ‘real time’ and the trend term ‘rendering reality’ which documents the desire for personal engagements via social media platforms such as WhatsApp and Snapchat and the willingness to accept the imperfections and glitches in the system, which makes us fundamentally human.”

Related Topics: