It’s online love, apptually

Mobile phone applications, or apps, have transformed the way we use phones.

Mobile phone applications, or apps, have transformed the way we use phones.

Published Aug 17, 2014

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London - “You’re never going to find him by sitting at home,” I say to my flatmate, having apparently turned into my mother. The moment the cliché leaves my lips, I realise that, in fact, I’m lying. These days, it’s easier to find a date while watching TV in your pyjamas than it is in your local bar, and it’s pretty much all due to the colossal takeover of the dating app Tinder over the past two years.

Defined by the sheer ease with which it facilitates matches, it’s no wonder that a society so used to instant gratification has embraced Tinder. So much so, the company recently announced it had made one billion matches – that’s a lot of swiping, right?

But Tinder fatigue has started to set in. Our thumbs and hearts are tired. With this in mind, I decided it was time for something new. In the process, I found the six apps that every single girl should get on her radar…

 

DOWN

How it works

I should preface this by warning you that Down was once called Bang With Friends. If that doesn’t tell you everything you need to know, let me expand. Down uploads your opposite-sex Facebook friends and, like Tinder, the object of your affections will only be notified if they’ve liked you too. You swipe up if you’d like a date, down if you want to, well, you know… get down, and left to politely decline.

THE LOWDOWN

My foray on to Down is spent incredulous that every man (single or not) I’ve ever met is on it. I begin formulating dramatic “You’re all busted!” tweets and then realise it has actually uploaded ALL of my male friends, regardless of whether they’ve joined. Once I get past this, I become a bit giddy at all the consequence-free, confessional swiping (yep, you’re hot. And you. Especially you. You did not look like that at uni, etc) and embrace the fun of it.

THE VERDICT

No stranger danger involved and good fun. Win.

 

GLIMPSE

HOW IT WORKS

If a picture paints a thousand words, Glimpse offers about 10 000 per person via 10 of its Instagram images. Like the look of someone’s photos, style or spontaneity? “Smile” at them and you can chat if you get a match. This is the creatives’ dating app.

THE LOWDOWN

Glimpse is a refreshing take on mobile dating as it relies on a much broader view of a person’s life. It also tends to attract quirkier, more artistic types that have more to say than just “Hey… LOL.” Always a winner.

THE VERDICT

Style and substance. Like.

 

KILLSWITCH

HOW IT WORKS

Ever lamented that Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (where memories of a failed relationship were erased) was purely fictional? Well, the app KillSwitch is the next best thing – it trawls through your Facebook profile and then removes all traces of your old paramour and their “stupid face” (their words, not mine; although it’s a good way of putting it, to be honest).

THE LOWDOWN

No need to deactivate their profile, tearily untag pictures of you together, or run the risk of seeing a picture of him with That Girl You Always Wondered About – KillSwitch does the legwork for you. The best bit? A portion of the app’s profits goes to the American Heart Association, so that one broken heart can help mend another.

THE VERDICT

A very modern way to help speed up the healing process.

 

TWINE CANVAS

HOW IT WORKS

Touted as the “anti-Tinder”, Twine asks you to create a canvas of images depicting your interests and likes in a bid to attract suitors who fancy you, brain first. My canvas acquired a surprising amount of interest considering it was mainly pictures of Phil Collins, poached eggs and cats. It puts you on a waiting list if your gender is overrepresented, only matches you with three people per day, then reveals what they look like.

THE LOWDOWN

I must admit, I “awwwed” when my first match flashed up: “Gareth Loves Your Personality!” The anti-objectifying philosophy is honourable but, let’s be brutally honest, you still have to find someone physically attractive.

THE VERDICT

Ostensibly the “intellectual” dating app. Intentions are very good.

 

REVEALR

HOW IT WORKS

Remember the boardgame Dream Phone where you worked out who your secret admirer was via vocal clues? Revealr is the modern update, only not imaginary and on your iPhone. Listen to someone’s voice for 20 seconds and if you both like what you hear, your pixelated images will come into focus.

THE LOWDOWN

Recording your audio profile is introduced as “the fun part”. It was excruciating, but I giggled like a schoolgirl listening to other people’s. Musical Irish lilt? Keep talking. Gruff, London wide-boy? Mmmm. Voices are intimate, sexy and say more about a person than a couple of generic sentences and a selfie ever could. Well played, Revealr, you’ll go far.

THE VERDICT

Unique and bound to hit the big time. – Daily Mail

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