MOVIE REVIEW: A Haunted House 2

Published May 9, 2014

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A Haunted House 2

DIRECTOR: Michael Tiddes

CAST: Marlon Wayans, Jaime Pressly, Cedric the Entertainer, Essence Atkins

CLASSIFICATION: 16 LVNSPB

RUNNING TIME: 87 minutes

RATING: *

“What did you expect?” That’s how readers respond when I write a negative review of a movie everyone expected would be bad.

In the case of A Haunted House 2, the sequel to Wayans’ horror movie parody, I didn’t expect much. But I did assume – this being a comedy and all – that I would laugh, at least once.

But this film is so stupid its well-earned R rating doesn’t seem sufficient. It should come with another warning: The next 87 minutes would be better spent alphabetising your spice rack.

Wayans reteamed with Rick Alvarez to write this follow-up, and he again stars as Malcolm, a man plagued by otherworldly forces. He has just moved into a new house with his girlfriend Megan (Pressly) and her two children, and no sooner do they start unpacking boxes when weird things begin to happen.

Megan’s daughter becomes obsessed with a large box she found in her closet, while her younger brother picks up an imaginary friend named Tony. And Malcolm, meanwhile, stumbles upon an old film reel of a ghoulish and incompetent demon that can’t seem to kill the house’s previous occupants.

Malcolm also begins an intimate relationship with a creepy doll Megan found in the closet, leading to a series of sex scenes that are so graphic, with such hard-core language coming from Malcolm, that it’s hard to believe only one-half of the participants is human.

Other setups that are supposed to qualify as funny include the relationship Malcolm has with his Mexican neighbour, in which the two trade racist barbs; a “joke” about Chris Brown and Rihanna’s violent past; an accidental puppy murder and prison rape.

If that weren’t enough, the editing is sloppy, the narrative is weak and every lame gag goes on twice as long as it should.

A Haunted House 2 definitely exceeds expectations – in the worst way possible. – Washington Post

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