Kelly Khumalo: lady is a vamp

The Star Tonight editor Lara De Matos. 170215 Picture: Karen Sandison

The Star Tonight editor Lara De Matos. 170215 Picture: Karen Sandison

Published Mar 6, 2015

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Forget Katch it With Khanyi. With frenemy, Kelly Khumalo, seemingly intent on usurping Miss Mbau’s longstanding reign as the queen of chasing after wedded members of the male species, we reckon TV producers would do well to start a spin-off series.

Keeping Up with KK has a nice ring to it (any unintentional allusions to wide-girthed men parading around in bed sheets and pointy white hats notwithstanding). Or perhaps we should just opt for the obvious and pit the two against each other in a local version of Girls Gone Wild:

She who manages to tally the highest number of married men (preferably with oodles of cash to their name or, at the very least, a degree of notoriety) in the shortest space of time, wins. Although, if bonus points are awarded for the average number of brawls, we may as well hand the crown and sceptre to Miss Khumalo from the outset.

In the event that you’ve spent the past few days alone, with no access to the outside world, sleeping in an ice shanty situated in the remote town of Ittoqqortoormiit (yes, it’s an actual place), Kelly once again hit headlines at the weekend due to boyfriend-related drama.

Apparently, having one baby-daddy behind bars for killing four children and another dead because he had the misfortune of being in the wrong place at the wrong time – i.e. with her – has done little to instil a sense of propriety in the singer.

As if to prove the point, she was already getting down and dirty with the next in a turnstile of beaus barely three months after Senzo Meyiwa (with whom she was supposedly sooo in luuurrve) was murdered.

True to her “you can take the girl out of the East Rand, but you can’t take the East Rand out of the girl” roots, Kelly’s tendency to lead with a klap (or, in this instance, a long-nailed finger) instead of conversation as a means of resolution, set social media aflutter at the weekend’s Metro Awards.

This, after she reportedly poked her latest partner, Zamokwakhe “Bhaka” Nzama, in the eye following an altercation. And yes, as you well could have guessed, her current piece of man candy is also espoused.

Nevertheless, in a show of something straight out of a scene from Oliver!, Kelly still wants more… It’s not enough that Nzama already has a wife; word is, Kelly’s demanding he kick her to the curb, much as she did with Mrs Meyiwa.

A true class act, is our Lady Khumalo.

But she may want to consider that since the whole mistress gig isn’t quite working out for her, perhaps it’s time she stop trying to cultivate other women’s gardens and look at growing her own.

 

LARA DE MATOS

TONIGHT EDITOR

[email protected]

@Lara_de_Matos

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