Dear Caitlyn Jenner. We get it: the courage it took to claw your way out of the proverbial closet after 60-plus years of life lived as a macho, macho man is certainly worthy of praise.
Particularly when the last decade of that time was spent under the relentless scrutiny of reality TV cameras, as part of showbiz’s most overexposed, famous-for-absolutely-no-reason-common-sense-could-ever-hope-to-fathom family, ever.
But some three months after your grand 1950’s era Vanity Fair grand reveal, fatigue is already starting to set in. Monotonous mindless meanderings on what style of dress to wear, how best to apply your make-up, or whether heels will make you seem too tall (you were born a man – height kinda came with the chromosomes) were all well and fine at the outset, when the world was still fascinated with the notion of quiet, background papa Bruce suddenly stealing the spotlight from his attention-craving Kardashian clan.
Not least, since said transformation took us from a muscular, one-time Olympic level decathlete, until-recently saggy around the edges (yes, despite the numerous botched plastic surgeries) guy’s guy, perpetually decked out in sweatpants, to a perfectly put-together woman who’s the very epitome of femininity.
Comparisons to the likes of Cindy Crawford are undoubtedly flattering (if a little far-fetched), but if the full focus of “the new you” is to be purely appearance-driven, one does begin to wonder if you are indeed helping, or hindering, the transgender cause.
Whatever became of your pledge circa Diane Sawyer (that is, pre your I Am Cait reality show deal) that you were “doing this to help my soul and help other people like me”? By all means, detail the cost of the multiple procedures you had to endure to metamorphose into the real version of yourself, duck pout and all; analyse the use of the word “vagina” ad nauseam; discuss the possible fall-out of presenting yourself as a transgender he-she at your ultra conservative country club.
But at what point do you plan to use your celebrity status to tackle the actual, very distressing issues confronting those ordinary “other people” like you, such as, oh I dunno, healthcare, jobs, safe schools and safe homes (to paraphrase fellow transgender celeb, Laverne Cox, of Orange is the New Black fame), considering many transgender folk face discrimination and great difficulty on these fronts?
Perhaps a little less commentary on your anti-gay marriage stance (huh?), or your lack of comprehension regarding your former spouse’s seeming failure to embrace the female you (erm, we think it’s fair to say having a husband decide to become a “wife” after 23 years of marriage would be a shock to anyone’s system), would also bode better for your rapidly fading level of interest.
Otherwise, we may have to assume the second half of that same Diane Sawyer statement – namely, “if I can make a dollar, I certainly am not stupid… Yeah, this is a business” – is the true motivating factor for your actions.
And if that is indeed the case, best you reconsider your business model very carefully. After all, as someone who has been linked to the entertainment industry in one guise or another for many a moon, you should know better than most: today’s headline act is tomorrow’s garden variety has been…