Ashley Madison has been exposed. For those of you not in the know, nay, I am not referring to an actual female. And by “exposed”, I use the term strictly on a metaphorical basis.
Though, given the context of this particularly juicy titbit, to say that Ashley has been laid bare or stripped naked would be equally appropriate.
Trite truisms aside, Lady Madison be in big, big trouble! This, after hackers managed to gain access to her most intimate, and supposedly closely guarded, regions.
Founded in 2001, AshleyMadison.com positions itself as a website aimed at wedded folk wanting to step out on their spouses – and apparently, there are “moonlighting” married people aplenty, given that the site claims to have 37 millions users across 46 countries.
Built on the back of “discreet encounters” because, hey, “Life’s short. Have an affair”, the very allure of Miss Ashley lay in the fact you could fulfil your every sexual desire, secure in the knowledge she would protect both you and your partner in illicit crime. That you were both married (so much for the sanctity thereof) served to further safeguard your mutual salacious secret.
No more having to skulk around with the handyman in all his tool belt-wearing glory. No more copping a feel of your 20-something waitress lover when you thought your wife wasn’t looking. No more playing footsie-footsie under the dinner table with your spouse’s best friend.
But this past Monday, customers faced the very real possibility of being unceremoniously outed for their adulterous actions, after the site was hacked. The culprits (rather unimaginatively calling themselves The Impact Team) demanded that AshleyMadison.com shut down immediately.
Failure to do so would result in TIT (now, now, keep it clean) “releasing all customer records, including profiles with all the customers’ secret sexual fantasies and matching credit card transactions, real names and addresses, and employee documents and emails.”
Good on TIT for standing up to this stain on our social mores, shout the sanctimonious among you. While others have suggested the motivation for the group’s action could lie in more practical pursuits, like getting government to charge these sites so-called sin tax, in much the same way consumers are charged for other vices such as alcohol and cigarettes.
But, alas, there is no such honour governing TIT’s cause. Rather, the rationale for their ultimatum reads more like a clear-cut case of possibly getting caught with your pants down. In a manner of speaking.
TIT’s manifesto went on to read that AshleyMadison.com – and its parent company, Avid Life Media – allegedly continued to store compromising personal data on its users (anyone else smell the distinct whiff of potential blackmail material?) even after they had opted to “Full Delete” their accounts; a feature which is effectively meant to “nuke” your very online cheating existence.
And it’s a facility users pay a pretty penny for – well, $19 (R234.82) to be exact. A service which, in an of itself, is estimated to net a cool $1 million per annum for the billion-dollar business.
So, other than the ethical debate around charging for a function they are not actually providing and the duplicity therein (gee, a site promoting cheating, dishonesty and deception that hasn’t exactly been faithful in their promises to their clients – what a shocker), you have to ask yourself why exactly TIT have their knickers in such a knot?
Why would the people comprising TIT be so concerned with the ability to completely expunge your Ashley Madison profile, unless they themselves had a vested interest in it?
And if, like me, you reached the obvious conclusion, you have to marvel at TIT’s twisted ethics, which allow them to declare storing someone’s personal information is wrong, but hey, philandering with any number of strangers and possibly destroying your loved ones just for kicks?
Now that’s perfectly okay.