Cape Town - “The Blue Train isn’t running,” I said morosely when Divine Lady D, her Boy Person, and offspring Bella Boo arrived in Mouille Point for the Great Putt Putt Championship of 2014.
“The what now?” she asked. Boy Person and I looked at her incredulously. “You don’t know about the Blue Train?” we asked in unison. “No,” she said defiantly, as if this was our fault somehow. “How long has it been there?” Only, like, forever. Well, more than 55 years and since that’s one of the few things older than me, it counts as forever. Poor Lady D; she never knew and she still doesn’t since it had to be scrapped from the itinerary.
The fiercely competitive game of putt putt was the main objective of the day, however. There had been a lot of trash talking in the week leading up to it, the way heavyweight boxers do. Boy Person, although he hadn’t played since last century, was confident. Lady D was quietly calm, apart from warning Bella Boo she was going to beat her. No maternal favours here. And there was some or other side bet between her and Boy Person involving a new pair of jeans, but I didn’t ask questions.
I was feeling pretty good myself, having had to hold back my A-game in a previous round with Bella during the last school holidays. Oh ha-hardy-ha.
Armed with our putters and different coloured balls (there are two secret pink ones, by the way), we teed off at the first hole. According to some reading up I did, the 18 holes should take 30 to 45 minutes. Again, cue derisive snort. We took about twice that long. This course is utterly ridiculously difficult..
When any of us did manage to pot our balls in three strokes or less it became reason for great celebrations, air punching, and whooping. You can imagine the victory dances when Lady D scored not one, but two, holes in one. It was these skills that crowned her the eventual winner of the championship by a small margin, with Bella and me about 20 strokes off the pace.
l Beach Road, Mouille Point, daily from 9am till 10pm (last game begins 9pm) weather permitting. Call 021 434 6805.
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