One thing I’ll never forgive my father for is the day he decided to reveal to us that the TV wrestling shows were fake. This was before the mandated adverts discouraging kids “not to try this at home” came out.
So after every episode my brothers and I would try to have a recap of our own, with the bed as our wrestling ring.
So, yes, like any other person who was a boy in the 1990s, wrestling was my life.
Dad was cruel in letting on that all of the action was staged.
Although we made peace with the fact that Ric Flair’s blood was fake and that The Undertaker never actually felt pain, we kept watching.
It’s 2013 now and WWE has stood the test of time – though Hulk Hogan and Brett Hart have been replaced by John Cena and Randy Orton.
There is less fighting and more trash talking.
You’d swear you were watching a soapie on steroids the way these buff guys call each other out on every episode.
While it may be an insult to the thinking man, the WWE bank account paints another story as the company keeps getting better and better.
The cash cow is obviously the merchandising, where T-shirts, caps, bags and even potato chips are packaged around the fake sport.
Now coming to South Africa after a three-year hiatus, WWE is looking to bring the action close to your town. Among the stars will be Dolph Ziggler, Alberto del Rio, Sheamus, Orton, Big Show, Jack Swagger, Mark Henry and our own local golden boy, Justin Gabriel (pictured).
“It’s been a while since we came back there and I am excited about coming back home,” said Gabriel.
“We travel a lot doing live events, so I never get time to come back to South Africa.
“I’ve been around the world 10 times and this year I have been to 14 countries already. I never really get time to visit family and friends, which is why I am glad that this opportunity came up.
The WWE South African invasion will start on July 30 when the beefy guys will be in Cape Town for two nights at the GrandWest Arena.
They then fly out to Durban’s Westridge Park Stadium on August 1 where they will entertain for one night only before they go to Joburg’s Coca-Cola Dome on August 2 and 3.
“Our shows are bigger and better this time, so I urge people to come and see us in action. I can safely say this will be the best live performance you will see in your life.”
Asked about the current storyline on Smackdown, Gabriel hinted that there were exciting developments to look out for.
“My main beef is with Wade Barret. You know us South Africans, we don’t get along well with the British, so we are cashing in on that,” he said, laughing.
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