For many children, the start of the school year is an exciting opportunity to socialise or an inconvenient reality.
Every child loves to learn – they love to learn what inspires and is important to them. If your child cannot see how the classes they are taking in their school, or how the children at their school are helping them fulfil what is most important and meaningful to them, they will resist going to school and attending their classes.
Here is some advice for anyone parenting a struggling child:
Perfection is a fantasy
If you live in a fantasy world where everything is supposed to be happy, easy, peaceful, safe and agreeable, you are vulnerable to the major let down when your fantasy is broken by the reality of life. Help your child understand that life is always in balance and that every challenging situation serves a purpose in their development.
Balance challenge and support
Over-protective parenting can be as damaging to a child’s wellbeing as harsh or negative parental styles. The answer, is to allow – or even encourage – your child to face challenge, and balance it with loving parental support. Everyone needs a balance of support and challenge to help them maximally grow.
Understand and work with your child’s values
If you want to support your child, it is vital that you are aware of their highest values. In order to establish an individual’s unique set of values, I have devised a set of 13 questions including:
- How do they fill their space?
- How do they spend their time?
- How do they spend their energy?
- How do they spend their money?
- Learn your child’s highest values and discuss with them how school assists in fulfilling those vital needs.
Bullies can serve a very important purpose – they can highlight where your child is disempowered. If your child has a bully in their life and they are pushing your child around, it's partly because they are not guiding or governing their own life. They’re not empowered in that area. Once they empower that area, the bully disappears.
If they don't empower themselves, the bully just keeps coming in to toughen them up, to make them stronger, so they empower that area.
To access more of Dr John Demartini’s teachings, visit www.drdemartini.com