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Flight safety demos tell you, in the event of an emergency, to put on your own oxygen mask before attempting to help others.

If you’re not familiar with this concept, think of a smartphone - nearly all of us have one - too many apps and your battery is sure to die sooner.

While self preservation is often perceived as selfishness, for those of us that are givers, it’s an essential concept to grasp.

When giving gifts this Christmas, focus your attention on the gifts you owe yourself.

While you may be compassionate to friends and family, care for children or ageing parents, these acts of love can be draining.

Think of those who depend on you, if you fall apart who will they have to depend on?

Caring for yourself is crucial.

This could be just half an hour to yourself. Time to have a cup of tea, or simply take a shower without a kid knocking on the door.

Women tend to struggle with the idea, when we really want to say no we can't, or out of guilt, we offer elaborate explanations.

Think of your bank account. There are non-negotiables that you know you must pay - such as a bond. Then there are things you may have money for, such as shopping, and then there are things you know you would never spend your hard earned cash on.

In a similar way, you have an emotional bank account. The currency is your health and wellbeing.

This December there are lots of things that may look worthwhile attending - but you can’t go to them all. Forget Fomo and enjoy Jomo, the Joy of me on my own.

If a day in your pjs makes you happy, then do that.

Also decide, who and what is important to spend yourself on.

Distance yourself from toxic people, disguised as friends, family and colleagues.

You know who these people are, as a guide consider how you feel after a conversation with him or her.

For example gas lighters are those people that fill you with doubt.

There are also the pathological liars and the competitive types.

If you can’t avoid these people, say at Christmas lunch, or holiday gatherings - select a song and put it on in your head for when they start to speak.

Once home, forget about them - when you start to unpack these conversations at your own dinner table you are inviting them into your personal life, in which case you might as well put him or her on a throne.

Distance yourself emotionally from toxic people.

If you yourself are feeling anxious, perhaps looking back or planning ahead, let go and make a conscious effort to be in the moment. Enjoy the holidays, take the chance to read to your children and enjoy having their company as they will be grown up soon.

Also be yourself #no filter. Stop comparing. Social media highlights the best aspects of people’s lives - of the hundred selfies they’ve taken, people will post only the best one. As a result we may look at the social media lives of others as perfect and feel compelled to compare. Be aware of the fact that this is not realistic.

Don't worry about what people think. Peace will come when you feel free to be who you really are.

Have a circle of friends high in value.

Christmas is a season of peace-loving so be sure to live your best life.