By Shaun Dreisbach
Stress is bad. And it's been linked to almost every ailment imaginable: heart disease, high blood pressure, metabolism problems, colds, depression, obesity, migraines and even breast cancer. But it's also an unavoidable fact of life.
"Research shows we're getting more stressed with each decade," says Dr Robert L Leahy, author of The Worry Cure (Piatkus, R170). "The typical student today has the same level of anxiety as the average psychiatric patient in the early '50s did - I'd imagine the same applies to young women."
In other words, the stress we deal with daily used to send people running to a shrink.
Research also shows women are more prone to the negative effects of stress than men. One reason? We tend to be more emotionally tuned in than guys, says Dr Pamela Peeke, author of Body for Life for Women (Rodale, R159). That makes us brilliantly perceptive - but also slightly, well, obsessive.
"A lot of women's brains are like mental salad spinners: put a problem in and it spins around endlessly in their heads," she says.
But not all stress is evil. In fact, experts agree that, in small doses, it can be good for you. So how do you know if the kind you have is of the harmless or toxic variety? Here, our experts pinpoint how bad seven common situations are for you.
Stress-O-Meter
On this scale, 1=healthy and 10= toxic. Where does your situation fall?
You Have a Crummy Day at Work (4)
This is what experts call acute stress - a situation that gets you temporarily riled but won't hurt you. "Acute stress triggers the fight-or-flight response in your body - your heart rate and blood pressure shoot up, your breathing gets quicker and shallower, and stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol flood your system," says integrative medicine expert Dr Woodson Merrell. "It burns up a lot of energy, so afterwards you're going to feel pretty wiped out." But in the end, it's just one tiring day spent in Cortisol Hell.
You Have a Crummy Day at Work... daily (9)
If that one bad blip turns into day-in, day-out pressure, you're dealing with chronic stress, which could do your body a lot of damage, says Dr Peeke. It's natural and healthy for your fight-or-flight response to switch on and off as needed, but during chronic stress periods it's always activated.
"Strain like this can lead to depression, insomnia, high blood pressure and cardiovascular disease," says Dr Merrell, author of The Source (Free Press, R662). "In fact, up to 80% of all illnesses are thought to be associated with stress."
Over time, high cortisol levels can weaken your immune system, so it's harder for your body to fight diseases. Recent research in the UK found that while stress doesn't necessarily cause cancer, women in high-pressure jobs had at least a 20% higher risk of breast cancer than those with less strain.
Money is Tight (8)
A new survey found that 78 percent of women are worried about money right now - more so than relationships, work and even family responsibilities. Cash flow problems and debt don't vanish overnight, so the stress they cause is often the ongoing, unhealthy, chronic kind, says Dr Leahy.
Other research backs that up - one poll found that 44% of people who were worried about debt suffered migraines, and 23 percent reported depression, compared with just 15 percent and 4 percent for those without money concerns.
That said, a woman who has a plan to pay off her debt - or to earn extra cash - may be in less danger. "The more control you have over a stressful situation, the less damaging it'll be," says Dr Merrell. "What's toxic is feeling helpless. Try to see your situation in less of a doom-and-gloom light." Staying positive will also make it easier to come up with practical solutions.
Your Relationship Breaks Up (6)
Yes, it's intense, but ultimately a breakup boils down to a drawn-out episode of acute stress. There's a beginning and an end - and when you're over it, so is your body, says Dr Peeke. (Thank goodness that jerk can't literally break your heart.)
Of course, if you were married or if you were living with your partner, the added anxieties of moving, legal issues and other practical concerns will pile on the pressure; it's not uncommon for the stress of divorce or a big breakup to push women into brief but intense bouts of depression, says Dr Leahy.
But every woman is different. How quickly you bounce back from a knock like this will depend on how much strain your body and brain can take - and what other stressful events are going on in your life, he says.
Someone You Love Passes Away (10)
The death of a close friend or family member is temporary stress. But it's intense, and getting past something this painful tends to take a long time, meaning that grieving often snowballs into chronic, unhealthy anxiety. "Any kind of longterm stress that makes you feel helpless, hopeless or defeated can veer into toxic territory," says Dr Peeke.
You Have to Give a Big Presentation (1)
Standing in front of a roomful of people may feel like killer stress, but this is an example of healthy pressure. "Good stress is anything that's associated with personal growth and self-improvement," says Dr Peeke. "It could mean running your first 5km, for example. It's stressful at first, but when you finish, it's like, 'Look what I did!'" Your body still goes into fight-or-flight mode, but the cortisol and adrenaline coursing through your veins actually help improve performance, making you temporarily sharper, faster or stronger.
You're Running Late (2)
"Will it send your heart rate up? Yes. Will stress hormones surge through your body? Yes. But the problem itself is so shortlived that you'll be back to normal in minutes, not days or weeks," says Dr Peeke. Now, if you're always running late, that's a different story. Like money issues, time management trouble can become a chronic source of stress.
"By cutting things so closely, you're running around frazzled all the time," says Dr Leahy. "And if it's happening first thing in the morning, the strain of being behind schedule is apt to seep into everything else in your day. It's a nasty cycle."
Stress busters
Four proven ways to feel calmer - and live healthier
1 Say hello to your inner guru "Deep breathing and meditation can have profound effects on your health," says Dr Merrell. When you feel stress start, he recommends saying this mantra as you inhale and exhale: "Breathing in, I feel calm. Breathing out, I smile."
2 Make sleep a priority
When you get a good night's rest, your mood-regulating serotonin levels stabilise. But when you miss out on sleep, your brain can't rebalance itself. What's more, a study of 18 to 30-year-olds found that sleep deprivation shuts down the mind's logic centres, which not only help you digest information but also aid in the release of calming hormones in the brain.
3 Make time for exercise
Some researchers believe that regular exercise may keep you from getting stressed out to begin with. As little as 15 minutes of exercise makes a difference, and "the benefits are even greater with regular workouts," according to Dr Jim Annesi, a wellness specialist.
4 Get off the mental treadmill
The next time you find your mind stuck rethinking the same old problem, say: "Adapt and adjust". It's a phrase that Dr Peeke uses herself. "It's meant to interrupt things and get you out of the 'Oh, flip!' mode and into ?OK, I have a problem; what's my game plan?'" she says.
Remember: "The most important thing about stress, in terms of how it impacts on your health, isn't what's freaking you out, but how you cope with it," says Dr Merrell.
What to Do When Stress Turns Toxic
Says Dr Merrell, "If you notice symptoms like headaches or poor sleeping patterns, then you're heading into bad territory." Other signs include back pain, breakouts, forgetfulness, nausea and even rashes.
And monitor your emotional state, too. "If little things send you off the deep end or it gets to a point where you feel you don't have control over your life, it's worth seeing a therapist," Dr Merrell advises. Aside from the fact that therapy can reduce anxiety, constantly feeling overwhelmed may be a sign of clinical depression or attention deficit disorder.