More women are cheating than ever before. Picture: Pexels

Men are cheats right? Except women are as well.

The concept of monogamy as counter-human nature is not new. The institute of marriage in the past few years, is maligned. Yet cheating has remained the supposed preserve of men.

In fact the noun cheater is masculine in many minds.

Rather than judge right or wrong, a number of candid female writers, are talking to women about their infidelity.

Psychoanalyst and writer Esther Perel’s who published State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity last year - a New York Times bestseller - told CNN since 1990 the rate of married women who report they've been unfaithful has increased by 40 percent, while the rate among men has remained the same.

Sydney-based editor, Nadia Bokody, told the Daily Mail the same thing in a story they published just last week.

The editor of She Said,  said her research revealed more women are cheating than ever before, with numbers having risen by 40 per cent.

The question is, why?


Fair is erotic

Author and sociologist Alicia Walker uses her book The Secret Life of the Cheating Wife: Power, Pragmatism, and Pleasure in Women’s Infidelity to create an argument for popularised term - the emotional labour gap.

She suggests women are simply doing more in their marriages than their partners. It’s the invisible, without credit, taken for granted stuff that has them telling you hubby is like an additional child.

A 2016 study The Gendered Division of Housework and Couples' Sexual Relationships: A Reexamination suggests couples who divide household duties equally have better sex. The division of labour in your household - not just taking out the trash, but including the unseen organisational tasks such as planning holidays, picking up toys, getting birthday cakes and planning daily meals - could well be a determining factor.

Because they can…

Most modern women can do whatever they want these days. Blame it on the times, but there is access. Women have access to numerous social media and online portals; most have jobs and therefore are financially secure enough to risk their relationships. The high incidence of divorce - some of them the products of divorced marriages themselves - may also influence why they stay but play.


Then again…

It doesn’t have to be rocket science. Your wife could just be bored. Sexually, emotionally dull relationships lead many women to seek out their own satisfaction. Some say it’s made their marriage partnerships better.


If you’re ignoring her you asked for it

Not to justify what sounds like pretty solid arguments, but the last point is pretty obvious as well. If she wants to talk and you nod but briefly say nothing before changing the subject, play video games rather than pay extra attention to her, or keep saying no to fun outings such as shopping and socialising - the modern women is going to get what she wants without you.