Cape Town - Sex should not be the side dish to the main course of life. This is the advice 28-year-old erotic writer Jade Zwane serves up during her seminars on the topic during a three-city tour of the country.
Her appearance in Cape Town is called Turn On Cape Town and takes place on Saturday July 27 at the Peninsula Hotel.
But be warned – it’s not for the fainthearted or prudish. Zwane’s no flower power child but she’s all for sexual liberation.
She describes herself as a sex educator and coach who isn’t afraid of ruffling feathers. In May, Metro FM management attempted to cut short a drive-time interview with her, during which she was discussing the importance of masturbation. The interview was so steamy it landed the radio station’s DJ T-Bo Touch and his crew in hot water with his SABC bosses.
Zwane may be a sex coach, but she doesn’t want people to think she cheers you on while you have sex. She mostly offers her services in Joburg. These include private sessions with couples and single people, and orgasmic meditation training. Her website describes the meditation as a “15-minute partnered sexual practice”.
Some might describe her as risqué or even foul-mouthed since she uses words for genitalia and having sex that we are all familiar with but would not consider polite English. But Zwane insists she has never had someone leave during a talk.
She describes herself as a late bloomer, having had her first kiss at 21 and losing her virginity at 23. She has since self-published an erotic novel called aDickted, which reads as the notes of fictional sex fiend Chrystal. Her raunchy adventures feature in a blog at www.adickted.co.za, where you can read about how Randy Rodney gets it on with Chrystal under the lunch table. It is squirm-worthy reading.
She describes aDickted as something that started as a little journal she would read to friends about sexual escapades.
Their response was that they wanted copies of the journal and so she self-published it in 2011, well before the 50 Shades saga hit the shelves. She says she dedicated the book to her former lover’s nether regions.
Writing the book motivated her to leave her work in logistics behind and to pursue sex coaching full time. She attended the One Taste institution in San Francisco, where she studied female orgasms. She’s been offering sex coaching and training ever since.
One of the reasons for Zwane’s openness about sex dates back to her childhood. She was raised by Witbank parents who were not shy on such topics.
“My parents started the conversation about sex when I was growing up. Now I feel like the roles are reversed. My mother asks me if I have tried different things. They are engaging conversations. We discussed the facts when I was young.
“My parents had a big influence on me. The environment they fostered contributed to my work. This doesn’t happen often in black families.”
Turn on Cape Town is a seminar open to men and women and will cover the topics of sexual liberation, sex as a skill and masturbation. It will include a pole dance performance, a sex toy demonstration and the talk.
Zwane says: “We all have desire, we just have to perfect the skill. Magazines often have a one-size-fits-all attitude to sex. I want to teach you how to unearth what gets you off. When I have private sessions with women, I help them find what helps them reach a full-body orgasm.”
Zwane feels it is important for parents to talk to their teenagers about masturbation.
“Masturbation among grown-ups, I see that it is acceptable for men but women think God is watching.”
Zwane says singles do come along to her seminars.
“I think single people come to hear me say that you are able to have sex outside of a relationship with it still being meaningful. You can connect with the person. I think singles come for that permission but I am not God or a guru.” - Sunday Argus
* Turn on Cape Town is on Saturday July 27 from 6pm to 10pm. Tickets are R350 and can be booked at www.jadezwane.co.za