By Sharon Gordon
Working in the sex industry is only for the very brave. It comes with preconceived ideas about who you are and what you stand for. It brings out the creeps and the depraved, so it is little wonder that when I entered the Industry almost 20 years ago, I changed the way business was done. But still the creeps survive!
I love the look on people’s faces when they ask what I do. I am deliberately vague and say, ‘I’m in the sex industry.’ They look at me with surprise trying to figure out what that means. Am I a hooker? That is quickly dismissed as I am not young or sexy enough. Then I can see them consider whether I’m a Madam, running a brothel, and that is where most settle.
If I’m interested in the person I’m talking to, I set them right and tell them that I started the Lola Montez Brand and sell sex toys as well as lecture, write and consult on intimacy and relationships. Find out more on the Lola Montez site.
One of two things then happens – either they move away swiftly, not caring if they’re rude or inevitably if it’s a man, proceeds to tell me the filthiest joke he can remember. If I have to hear the joke about the blonde pointing to a fire extinguisher one more time, I’m going to stop the teller mid- sentence. If it’s a woman, she wants to know how I got into the business and then eventually we talk about toys.
This past week I’ve had the deviants come out to play. At 2h20 on Wednesday morning I received a WhatsApp video call. Now I don’t know about you but when my phone rings after 9 someone has died.
I didn’t recognise the number, so I didn’t answer (all my loved ones were safely at home). Next a picture was delivered and then another video call. I ignored them all until the sun came up. I was irritated because I am a very bad sleeper and could not get back to sleep.
In the morning, the picture was a dick pic. Not the best or the worst I’ve ever seen, but that’s hardly the point. How does someone who I don’t know and registers as ‘Peace’ send a dick pic at 2 in the morning and then expect me to answer the call?
Did he think I’d take one look at it and fall in lust? I’d actually love to interview someone with such limited intellectual and emotional capacity. Does this work for him? Ever?
Dick pics are an interesting phenomena. Why would you send one to a woman un-invited? What is the thought process?
Is it:
She’s a horny beast and would love to see me?
She hasn’t had it for a while, so she’ll be desperate?
Let’s see if I can get a reaction?
I wonder if she’ll be intimidated?
Let’s see if I can scare her?
She’s in the sex industry, she deserves it?
I’m horny, let’s see if I can get someone who doesn’t know me to play?
Now I love a beautiful penis as much as the next woman, but it needs to be attached to a brain who respects me, not some depraved idiot who has nothing better to do at 2 in the morning.
Was he honestly thinking I’d come back with intimate pictures of myself? I decided to send him some dick pics back. These were wart and sore covered with a note saying thanks for sharing. Do you think this half wit got the message? No!
On Friday morning just after 2 it started again. First with the video call then, ‘Hey Sharon’, two more calls then emojis of an aubergine, devil and 2 glasses of wine, then 3 more video calls, then ‘I still want to lick between your thighs until you cum, we can get tested first for STDs and HIV ‘, (thanks for that!) Another video call, then’ I know you hate my sending of my big black cock and maybe I’m crazy hence I am crazy for you’. Another video call, then ‘Talk to me, what more should I do???’
And then it stopped. I replied the following morning with ‘Get help and F@#$ off’ – and then I blocked the number. But I’m sure that he will move onto easier prey.
I just don’t get it. Either Peace is trying to harass and scare me, or he is looking for a relationship. Neither have worked. Is he just a sick individual or is he dangerous or both?
Why do women have to put up with this and what makes men think that they can continue to harass with impunity. The answer is because they can. He was very clearly letting me know that he knows my name, has my mobile number and disregards my privacy. He has no respect for me and assumes that I’m gagging or afraid of him. I am neither.
I have tried to call the number but naturally no answer. We have a typical bully hiding behind being anonymity. It’s easy when you don’t have to face your accuser.
Sexual harassment comes in many forms and this is one of them. From my discussions it’s endemic with almost everyone I know having to deal with it in one way or the other. But not one man I know has owned up to sending an unwanted, unsolicited dick pic. So, who are these men? Can we call them men?
Would one of you please stand up and give me an insight into the thought process at 2 in the morning when you think it’s okay to send a woman a picture of your genitals. As an aside I’m thinking of starting a subscription based blog, where I am going to post the pictures, and screenshots with text and phone numbers. Let the chips fall where they may. I too can harass and get my own back.
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