By Carol Lazar
Scuba diving off the coast of Cape Town is damn cold, even in summer. This far down south, you won't see coral and bright-coloured reef fish but, if you're lucky, you might glimpse a great white shark, dolphins or, during the season, even the unforgettable sight of a southern right whale.
Only once have I seen a whale while diving, and that happened after I'd climbed back into the dive boat and we were returning to shore. So, in actual fact, it wasn't really a "diving with a southern right" experience.
Although I've dived these waters on several occasions, the shark cage experience is still one I have to experience, but after watching a recent National Geographic documentary on the topic, I can't wait for the waters to warm a little before I get to eyeball one of these graceful creatures.
Meanwhile, clothed, you can go for a drive anywhere in the wild Cape Point game reserve, train your binoculars seawards and chances are that you'll glimpse the distinctive triangular fin of a great white cleaving through the water. That's while you're looking around for curious baboons in the vicinity who might pay you an unexpected visit, not to mention antelope and the occasional friendly dassie.
Then again, you can take it easy and go for a relaxed drive along the coastline past Simon's Town and spend the morning picnicking on the beach with the African penguins at Boulders Rocks.
This large colony, expanding because of pro-active conservation, is relaxedly sociable in the water and will not take it amiss if visitors join them for a little swimming and snorkelling.
It's while clambering on the rocks surrounding the beaches, that you should give them their space and not get too near, especially when there are eggs or young in the vicinity.
Penguins being disturbed on their own turf have sharp beaks and will use them when threatened.
A little further along the south-eastern coastline, if you're swimming, kakaying or paddleskiing, the chances are that you'll find yourself in the company of 50 or 150 dolphins, another breath-catching experience.
And, if you're lucky enough to be near Walker or San Sebastian Bays during the whale season, then watching from offshore you'll sometimes see as many as 70 southern right whales frolicking in the deep blue.
If you shoot up the West Coast, although the Atlantic is colder and wilder than the Indian Ocean, there's plenty happening off shore. Large seal colonies, sharks by the dozens and, for serious salt-water anglers, some of the finest off-shore fishing available.
Stand with a large rod and even the most inept angler will catch her or himself a good-sized dinner.
But swimming's another matter. Tides are vicious and you might find yourself en route to the Americas before you have time to catch your breath.
The further up the Cape's West Coast you go, the wilder and bleaker it gets, and by the time you reach Namaqualand, you are in serious 4x4 countryside.
A while back, we packed our ancient 4x4, and decided to go exploring.
Taking the N7 north towards Namibia, we kept branching off, taking roads and westward tracks to the sea and found ourselves in parts of southern Africa that make even Botswana look like a picnic. There were days when we didn't spot another soul, and had we broken down, we might still be there doing our hunter and gatherer thing.
This is a coastline for those who like long, austere beaches littered with windswept dunes, bits of whale and seal bones, gulls, cormorants and not much else.
Fishing is serious stuff in these parts, and although there are bed and breakfast establishments right along the coastline, they're far and few between, and most visitors camp, as we did.
Should you find yourself in this part of the world round about August and September, you'll have the additional pleasure of experiencing wild flowers appearing in their carpeted masses.
It can happen virtually overnight - depending on the rains. Time your flower visit for roughly two months after the rains and you should be lucky.
We once found ourselves in a remote plek along the coastline - it was, if I recollect, called Kleinsee situated where the Buffels River meets the sea. I remember we'd been in Springbok visiting a geologist friend.
The flowers were here and there, but it seemed they were nothing spectacular - and then suddenly, virtually overnight, they popped up their heads and the countryside turned into a patchwork quilt of colour.
The Garden Route has always been sold as one of our top tourist areas. I've driven along it several times in the past months and quite honestly, each time, my disappointment increases. It's becoming built up and over-exploited, with ugly housing schemes (ghastly look-alike suburban cluster units) popping up like toadstools certainly from Mossel Bay to Plettenberg Bay.
Of course, people should drive slowly and within the speed limits. But in these parts, even when there are no villages or townships in the vicinity, the speed-trapping is excessive.
Countless letters have been received from readers complaining about relentless ticketing by overzealous officials. George and Plettenberg Bay seem to be the worst offenders. Bumping up municipal revenue at the expense of visitors seems unreasonable, especially when, as many have pointed out, the driving on the roads is shocking but there are no cops patrolling up and down to ticket those driving less than roadworthy cars like lunatics.
Despite this glitch, the coastline, along the Western and Eastern Cape until you hit KwaZulu Natal is remarkable in its variety.
The affluent traveller will be happy with the variety of five-star accommodation available in some of our country's finest hotels and resorts, and thankfully, for the majority, there's a healthy sprinking of affordable parks, reserves and resorts which still cater to locals with beer-budget incomes.
The De Hoop Marine Reserve, Breede River Lodge, the village of Witsands, Still Bay, Little Brak River, the Wilderness National Park, Sedgefield, Goukamma and Nature's Valley are just a few of the gems that spring to mind.
Once, while visiting the Tsitsikamma National Park, we spent hours watching a couple of otters at the edge of the water. They were seemingly unconscious of our presence and we felt privileged to share their space.
The Storms River Mouth is one of the scenic highlights of the area and if you don't feel like hoofing it, you could take a trip on the quaint Outeniqua choo choo. On the other hand, you're feeling energetic, do yourself a favour and hike the Otter Trail. It's one of life's great experiences. Booking is mandatory as the trail fills up months ahead.
If you look at maps of our coastline, you can see how our past history has fashioned our ountry.
Happiest hotels in the world
Where large numbers of colonialists put down their routes, development followed with speed and towns and cities were built. For obvious reasons, large rivers have played their part in peopling various areas, but despite that, it's still remarkable how much of the coast is, relatively pristine.
The Eastern Cape, one of the country's poorest provinces, is also one of our most beautiful, and the area from East London right up to Port St John's is just waiting to be explored.
Small resorts and B&Bs run by formerly disadvantaged communities are opening up everywhere and offer excellent holiday options for South Africans who want to travel explore but don't have large financial resources.
Journey this way and you'll discover endless beaches with clean sands and unbeatable swimming and surfing. You'll find tiny seaside villages where visitors are made to feel so welcome that they don't want to leave, and the resorts and hotels at Haga-Haga, Mazeppa Bay, Qora Mouth, The Haven and Coffee Bay have to be some of the happiest in the world.
This is where you'll find cows, buck or hippos coming down to the beach to swim, where, if you're camping, you'll happen upon fresh springs with sweet water. This is where you'll have locals sharing their knowledge of the best fishing spots, or offering to take you on hikes along the coastline for a minimal fee.
The coastline meanders upwards through KwaZulu Natal and perhaps that's one of the most interesting province of all, for from Port Edward through to Durban, the coastline is one well-known seaside town after another.
Gautengers have been flooding to the South Coast for ever, and the interesting thing about towns such as Ramsgate, Margate, Port Shepstone, Hibberdene, Scottburgh et al, is that beside the fact that they're totally built up, the seaside atmosphere of a holiday town or village still remains.
For fun in the sun with all the amenities, this is the place to be. Personally, I've always preferred the North Coast, but then again, it's the wilder part of the province.
We once stayed with friends who owned a small dilapidated cottage at Zinkawzi Bay. They kept begging us to buy a share for R10000 (which way back was far more money than we could afford and besides we didn't want to be stuck in one place for our holidays). I heard recently that the same cottage (which admittedly has been tarted up somewhat) went for R12-million.
That said, I'm still happier spending time in the St Lucia marine reserve (here you can play "I spy your eye" with crocodiles). Alternatively, camping at Sodwana and go on a scuba-diving course (there are several schools in the vicinity) which will enable you to check out the southern most coral reefs in Africa.
Finally, for coastline perfection, Kosi Bay has it all. It's wild, wonderful and still unspoilt. Protected by the Maputaland marine reserve, this is a place of peace, flamingoes, hippos, dolphins, turtles and some of the best birding in the country.
Just across the border nestles Mozambique, but that's another country, another story.