QUESTION: I've got a lot of driving to do over this holiday period - visiting friends and relations all over the country.
To my horror, I have found that as I get older - I'm 67 - I have become almost phobic about going on freeways and driving at night, which really limits me in winter. I try to keep to ordinary roads and drive in daylight, but will this fear be with me for ever? I feel my life getting really restricted and don't like it at all. I hate going by train and anyway it always put everyone else out as they have to come and pick me up. Do I have to accept it all as part of ageing?
Yours sincerely
Teresa
ANSWER: You can deal with the freeway phobia. And it is a phobia. It's quite common for people, as they get older, suddenly to lose confidence in driving, particularly if they find their sight isn't what it used to be, even if it's well within the driving limit.It only takes one near miss on a freeway - or even think you had a near miss - and your body will then react with all the same panic symptoms when you next approach one.
It's a common condition and that's why you'll often find older people crawling along secondary roads in a desperate attempt to avoid freeways - even if the journey takes twice as long.
But it's worth addressing the problem, because once your confidence is dented, it can often spread to less stressful roads, and soon you'll be finding it hard even to get your car out of its parking space without coming out in a cold sweat. A psychologist can help - ask your doctor to refer youto a variety of courses available that you could sign up to.
But driving at night as you age is a different matter. The problem is that when you get older, pupils shrink and don't dilate as much in the dark as they used to, and means that less light gets into the eyes. It's why we need extra-strong reading lights, as well. Driving at night can be like wearing dark glasses, and when cyclists without lights or bright jackets loom up, it's bad enough in the day, let alone the night. Just because they can see you, doesn't mean you can see them.
The other problem is that the cornea and lens in the eye gets less clear as we age, and that means glare is increased, making it less easy to see objects on the road at night. According to friends with the same problem, even traffic lights can seem as bright and dazzling as fireworks.
At the moment, there's nothing to be done about this. So what I'd do is, except in exceptional circumstances, give up driving at night - it will only make you more nervous about getting into the car - and resolve to drive only during the day, and to overcome the freeway phobia.
Yes, there are a lot of things that are restricting as you get older. But try to balance it up with the pluses - the increased confidence, the kindness of the younger generation. I know it must be horrible not being able to drive at night, but once you come to terms with it, you'll be able to cope better with being more dependent on taxis and friends on occasions when there's no option but to travel after dark.
The Independent