The rumour was roundly denied by both Liverpool and Newcastle United, but even so the figures were perplexing. Andy Carroll could return to Tyneside in a deal worth £15million, or even £10m, the reports said. Yet, if Liverpool could be persuaded to sell, why would anyone pay that money for him?
A fee of £15m, or less, seems cheap only because Liverpool overpaid so massively at £35m. Forget that figure for a moment and just consider Carroll’s last year in football.
Reviewing his form in that time, would a striker with six goals — two of which were scored against Exeter City and Oldham Athletic — command £15m? Even £10m would be pushing it, certainly for a club like Newcastle where investment is limited.
Carroll has scored two Premier League goals this season, placing him in the company of, for example, Leroy Lita (Swansea City), Kevin Davies (Bolton Wanderers) and Jay Bothroyd (Queens Park Rangers), none of whom would fetch anywhere near £15m.
He is younger, at 23, but the same age as Everton’s Victor Anichebe, another two-goal Premier League striker, who would be hard pressed to command a £10m fee.
The only positive from the Luis Suarez debacle was that it distracted, momentarily, from the Carroll issue, just as Carroll’s main contribution has been to obscure the fact that Stewart Downing, an expensive attacking midfield player, has scored one goal in all competitions for Liverpool this season, the 90th-minute fifth of five against Oldham Athletic in the FA Cup.
Downing’s troubles, meanwhile, have been a helpful smokescreen for the teething problems experienced by another costly buy, Jordan Henderson. Between them, Carroll, Downing and Henderson have scored three goals against Premier League opposition in this campaign, which is scant return on an outlay of £71m.
It is said that Liverpool’s director of football Damien Comolli has great interest in the Moneyball theories that found a different way of evaluating baseball players. Maybe he could try Carroll at shortstop.
Real Madrid have had 24 changes of manager since Sir Alex Ferguson took over Manchester United in November 1986. Ferguson has won 12 League titles and two European Cups in that time, an achievement that is widely seen as confirming the worth of dignity, patience and loyalty. In the same period, Madrid have won 10 La Liga titles, but three European Cups and lead the domestic championship by a significant margin. Proof that, if you are big enough, powerful enough and throw sackloads of money at it, short-termism, borderline lunacy and the patience of a two-year-old on six glasses of Sunny Delight pretty much works, too. – Daily Mail