Racism begins at home

I RECENTLY walked into the cafeteria of a private high school and was disturbed by what I witnessed. Pupils were huddled in different groups, laughing and enjoying their break between lessons.

What concerned me was that the groups were racially exclusive. Groups of white pupils sat on their own, Africans and Indians on theirs. One or two groups had a sprinkling of racial mix, but most did not.

Parents’ events at the school were no different.

This week's incident at a Pietermaritzburg school where a Grade 11 pupil was suspended for using the "K word" refreshed these memories and reignited the debate over racism at schools.

It also placed the spotlight, again, on the blame game. Who do you blame for racism at schools: parents, pupils, the school?

There is some irony in this incident. The young pupil, who is white, was ostensibly furious because her fellow pupils, who presumably were black, had incorrectly pronounced her name.

So angered was she at this that she sent a voice note to a friend lambasting the students, used the "K-word" to refer to them, saying they were “going to get it”.

The irony is that many people struggle to correctly pronounce African names - and few bother to get it right, choosing instead, rather disrespectfully, to simply Anglicise names.

Pietermaritzburg Girls High, the centre of a race storm this week. File picture: Facebook

A typical example is where there is an "X" in an African word or name - rather than muster a click sound to pronounce the name, many non-Africans simply choose to pronounce it as “C”. Yet there is no complaint or racial rant from Africans who, by nature, are forgiving and compromising.

It would be naive to think children randomly project racism. Children are taught racism - largely by watching their own parents engage and discuss the issue.

Beyond that, schools themselves seem unsure how to teach non-racism. For many, sharing cultural experiences equates to issues around basic cultural tolerance, for example teaching children to share cultural food and engage in discussions of different South African cultures.

Beyond that, many schools still struggle to broach the issue of teaching racial tolerance and so mask it under “cultural acceptance” - which is different and explains why the suspended pupil was so comfortable with using the "K word".

Interestingly, a 1999 study by South Africa's Human Rights Commission into racism at schools could well have been done this year. Comments from pupils make for interesting reading, like “we only mix in class, but outside it's a zebra crossing”.

Schools need to have a firm no-tolerance policy on racism and spell this out clearly to pupils in the code of conduct.

They also need more dialogue on racial tolerance and what it means - not simply cultural activities such as foods of South Africa days.

A key challenge is that most parents and school governing bodies today belong to a generation that has not had the opportunity to cross the racial divide.

Integration has been confined to places of work - and the odd office function or annual Christmas party.

The lack of social interaction beyond the corporate walls has contributed to the protracted racial debate we continue to have 23 years after apartheid rule.

Assimilation in society and non-racism at schools will not disappear as long as parents and schools adopt the “ostrich method” and pretend it will go away if not talked about.

As long as there is no effort to integrate beyond our corporate walls, the racial divide will persist. As long as parents attending school events find comfort in sitting with their “own” racial group rather than embracing and surrounding themselves with diversity, children will mimic this behaviour.

The war on racism will only be won if we are genuine about rooting it out and criminalising it. And while the argument that it's “all in the past” is often used to deflect conversation around racism, it simply is a convenient Band Aid to avoid discussing a sensitive issue.

For many whites, it's frustration at dredging up an era they would prefer not to remember. But today's generation must appreciate what those past lessons mean.

It's not simply about teaching about apartheid or Nelson Mandela. It's about what racism means today and the importance of making an effort to be inclusive, tolerant and, most of all, how it affects those who were victims.

There were many incidents where schools simply tried to sweep things under the carpet, to hush- hush the incident and hope it will soon be forgotten and blow over.

There remains discomfort in dealing with racial issues - too sensitive, too controversial.

So, when incidents do occur, they are often dealt with through meetings with parents behind closed doors, issuing a meek apology if they are forced to do so and life goes on until the media or the Department of Education is alerted.

By then, the scandal is exposed, the silence broken and the image shattered, like the one involving 13-year-old Pretoria pupil Zuleikha Patel who refused to change her natural Afro hair to suit the school.

The story made international headlines - and she went on to be named among the BBC's 100 inspirational and influential women of the world.

The recent incident at the Pietermaritzburg school must be a wake-up call for schools, parents and pupils.

We all need to do our part if we are ever to come to terms with the debate on racism. There needs to be an effort to get to know one another as South Africans, to get out of our comfort zones and racial pockets, especially in KZN and reach out.

Reiterating to our children that racism will not be tolerated teaches them to be tolerant and understand the boundaries. Advocating the values of equality, justice and diversity promotes pluralism and encourages our children to carry those morals in their own exchanges with friends and society.

Suspending the pupil was the right thing to do, as we must have consequences for racial intolerance. But hatred begets hatred and will only perpetuate the vicious cycle. Instead, the lesson must be in encouraging an understanding of why the use of the "K word" evokes such a strong reaction and social backlash. An apology is simply an acknowledgement of wrongdoing, not a confirmation that the implications or impact is appreciated.