In a lengthy social media post addressed to his friends, family and fans on Wednesday, an emotional Craig Lucas spoke out about being gay, trying to take his own life “for living a lie” and turning to drugs and alcohol to help him cope.
Speaking to the Daily Voice, Lucas says he spoke to his mom, Jennifer, before posting his "coming out" letter online.
“I spoke to my mom before I did it, just to make sure she is OK with it, I just needed my mom’s approval,” he says.
“I was so calm about this, I made myself some tea, sat with my laptop, typed it out, uploaded the letter to Twitter and Facebook and then I put on a movie thereafter.”
Craig says he had nightmares after posting the brief and was heartened to be “flooded” by the calls and messages of support he received.
In the letter, Craig recalls the moment in 2011 when he realised he was in love with a man.
He had met the outjie during his first year at the University of Cape Town and they were good friends and often got drunk together.
Describing the moment he realised he was in love, he said: “I was unequivocally, profoundly, violently in love with a man. My head started spinning and I felt like I wanted to throw up. I made up an excuse to get home. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough...”
He explains he finally found a sense of freedom when he came out to his family in 2016.
But when he started his "The Voice SA" journey, those closest to him told him to keep his sexuality a secret “because the audience is conservative and no one will vote for you”.
“So I did, and I won. ‘I’m glad I listened to them,’ I thought.”
But a year later, and despite his flourishing musical career, Craig was still battling with depression and suicidal thoughts.
And he decided it was time to stop “hurting those he loved” and to stop “living a lie”.
Asked how she felt about her son’s letter, Jennifer told Daily Voice: “I’m not going to crucify my child. I need to be there for him and I am praying the Lord will navigate him safely through this.”