London - As American researchers claim that, far from being so different they might as well be from rival planets, men and women are surprisingly similar, CLAUDIA CONNELL begs to differ - highlighting some distinctly masculine and feminine traits...


* Empty the contents of their pockets on to a work surface when they get home, only to stuff said contents back in their pocket the next morning.

* Devastate a kitchen making a sandwich. Women can butter bread, lay cheese on and put it on a plate without leaving every cupboard open and condiment out.

* Do anything to avoid emptying a bin. When it’s full, a woman takes it out - instead of shoving the contents down with her foot.

* Restrict their culinary delights to recipes containing mince. As nice as chilli and spaghetti bolognese are, she won’t want them every day.

* Rearrange themselves in front of colleagues. If she needs to adjust her underwear, a woman will find a quiet, private place.

* Consider a trip to the loo to be an important or major part of her day. She won’t feel the need to announce it beforehand or take reading material in with her.

* Make a cup of tea by removing the teabag from the mug, then carrying it dripping on the spoon across the kitchen to the bin - rather than taking the mug to the bin.

* Treat TV commercial breaks as their three-minute mission to find something else to watch, frantically flicking through channels.


* Play the “guess what’s wrong with me” game, whereby they sob or sulk but refuse to explain what is upsetting them - instead just snapping “I’m fine,” whenever they are asked.

* Come home from work and spend two hours on the phone gossiping to the colleague they have spent eight hours with.

* Make pointless small talk while watching something at the cinema or on TV. If they recognise an actress, men keep it to themselves and don’t list other shows she has been in, or wonder if she’s gained weight.

* Understand how having a bath could ever be considered a treat. Men get in, get out and leave a scum mark behind. You’ll never find a man lighting candles, adding scented oils and listening to whale music.

* Ask if they look fat and then refuse to believe any answer given. If you say that men are a little overweight, they will not burst into tears and lock themselves in the bathroom for an hour.

* Put on a baby voice if they want something. It would never occur to a man that talking like a toddler could ever possibly lead to him getting his own way.

* Require or desire company when going to the loo on a night out. Men wouldn’t dream of tagging along with their best friend. - Daily Mail