Durban - This week, Stephanie Bissland, the wife of South African, Brian Steven Smith, who has been accused of brutally murdering two women in Anchorage, Alaska, spoke to the Independent of Saturday about how the couple came to know each other and how a story of true love turned to heartbreak.
Smith, 48, who grew up in Queenstown, was arrested on October 8 and is being held pending trial on 13 counts, including murder in the first degree, second degree, sexual assault, tampering with physical evidence and a 14th count of misconduct involving a corpse.
These counts were in connection with the murders of Kathleen Henry and Veronica Abouchuk.
He was arrested after an Anchorage resident found an SD card on the street, It was titled “Homicide at Midtown Marriott” and contained videos and images showing a woman being tortured, raped and murdered. The man’s voice on the video had a South African accent which police identified as belonging to Smith.
Blues musician Bissland, 69, said she and Smith met through online gaming in February 2013 and skyped together for the first time in March 2013.
"“We then knew our real life names and began to talk about things other than games. We also became Facebook friends, so we learned about each other, sharing posts and pictures.
“We continued to get to know each other more. With the time difference, we Skyped twice a day. Sometimes our sessions were hours,” she said.
Smith tried to get a visa to work in the US so he could visit his new girl Stephanie in Alaska, but the restrictions were too tight.
Bissland said that in July 2013, Smith proposed to her on Skype. She said “Yes” and planned her first trip to South Africa so they could meet face to face in August 2013.
“I first saw him rushing over to me in the Durban airport. We were both excited and happy and not awkward at all. The next day we drove to Estcourt and stayed in the guesthouse he managed. He proposed again on his knee,” she said.
The couple shared their first proper date in a local steakhouse on the day she arrived.
“We sat close and talked. The management didn’t kick us out at closing and left us alone talking until clean-up was done and the smiling staff were going home. I think they saw something special was happening with us.”
Staying at the guesthouse in Estcourt, Bissland said they spent the holiday visiting nearby places, sharing a picnic next to a fire at Wagendrift Dam and having dinner in Nottingham Road.
When they drove back to Durban, Bissland said Smith bought her “a token engagement ring” before she left.
In September 2013, Bissland petitioned for a visa for her fiance and Smith arrived in the US at Dulles Airport, Washington DC, in March 2014. There the couple were treated to an engagement party by Bissland’s best friend before sightseeing in Alexandria and Washington then going to Bissland’s home in Anchorage.
Smith proposed again and gave her his mother’s De Beers flower-shaped engagement ring and they were married on May 17, 2014.
“Brian took care of me, he is a clever man. He was proud of my accomplishments.
“He loved to pull pranks on me and laughed like a kid at his jokes. He has a good work ethic. He was an open, pleasant, normal person,” she said, adding that Smith would often surprise her with generous gifts, such as a book or a violin she may have mentioned in passing. She described Smith as enjoying woodwork, fixing electronics for resale, hiking and being outdoors, as well as photography.
For Bissland, it was just simple togetherness, which remains her favourite memory of those heady romantic days,
Together they made a greenhouse from a pile of windows; he helped her to make props for a stage play she was involved in; they ate sandwiches and talked while sitting at the side of a mountain and “swimming with him in the ocean in Hawaii and in South Africa”.
In February 2016, the couple visited South Africa so Bissland could get to know his family and friends better. They travelled from Johannesburg to tour around the Southern Cape to Smith’s home town, Queenstown, as well as East London, where he had lived and worked.
“We had ‘us’ time along the route” and they visited the Cango Caves, animal reserves, historic sites, stopping at small villages and stalls.
“It was a fabulous vacation. We hoped to go back for another visit this year,” she said.
But instead, this year Smith will stand trial for murders which have shocked Alaska and made international headlines.
Bissland said that on learning of his arrest, “I was horrified and could not believe it. No-one who knew him believed it”.
She was on holiday in Virginia at the time.
“The detectives who flew down to Virginia asked questions that showed me that there were things I didn’t know, I was a mess,” she said.
She cut short her holiday and went back home, where she had good friends for support.
“I was worried about Brian, I was outraged at the terrible messages sent to me, but I never commented back. I was lost.”
Bissland said that since her husband’s arrest, she had been seeing a therapist and “I went through the steps of grieving several times. I went through the ‘if only’ stage and have come to accept the situation. I prayed and put much on God’s shoulders being stronger than mine”.
She added that she and Smith exchanged letters and she had visited Smith, who remains behind bars. His bail was set at $2m (R29.5m). She said they never discussed the case, but “just us”.
“Some people are hot on why I haven’t divorced him, why would I stand behind him, why visit?
“ I am his wife. I take care of his welfare, how he is mending. I can do things for him from the outside, I think he needs to communicate with someone. I am helping the part of the man I married,” she said.
Smith is scheduled to be back in court in Anchorage at the end of the month for a discovery hearing.