Durban - A teenage girl has claimed that publicly fobbing off sexual advances from her date at a school dance has made her a target of continuous bullying by the older boy and his friends.
Having been degraded and labelled vile names, including “leftovers”, for months, she and her furious mother are now demanding action be taken against the boys.
The 14-year-old girl, a Grade 9 pupil from Pietermaritzburg, is battling depression, her mother said, as she feels she was being punished for having evaded the boy’s sexual advances that night, by running away from him.
It is alleged that during a Valentine’s Day dance at the school hall in February, the 17-year-old boy grabbed her thighs and forcefully kissed her in front of other pupils.
The girl’s mother said she had repeatedly complained to the school authorities, including the principal, but he had allegedly told her it was a personal matter and had nothing to do with the school.
The mother said the daily bullying had resulted in her daughter losing weight and her marks slipping.
In a twist of events, the boy’s family have opened a case of assault against the mother after he sustained a facial injury during a confrontation with her outside school in May.
The mother said she was let off with a “warning”.
Speaking on behalf of her daughter, she said she wanted justice.
“All I want is for action to be taken against the boy and the bullying to stop.”
She said she and her husband are divorced and that their daughter initially lived with her father in Gauteng.
When he contracted a kidney problem, the teen relocated to Durban as her ex-husband was unable to take care of her.
Relating the alleged events of that night, the 42-year-old mother said: “She was not dating the boy but I allowed her to go to the dance with him because she was new at the school and I did not want her to feel left out."
“When I left her at the venue, she was happy, but when I returned to fetch her, she looked upset. I tried talking to her that night, and over the next few days, but she seemed distracted. A week later, a friend told me the boy had grabbed her thighs and forcefully kissed her at the dance in front of everyone.”
She said she immediately questioned her daughter.
“She told me that during the dance, she left the hall with her friends to get some air. Her date followed her outside and in front of everyone started rubbing her thighs and forcefully kissed her.”
The mother said her daughter told her she ran back into the hall and waited there until the dance ended.
“When she returned to school on the Monday, they got into an argument and he started calling her derogatory names and his ‘leftovers’ in front of everyone. Every day since, they have been bullying her.”
The mother said she confronted the principal about the alleged incident at the dance and the subsequent bullying
“He told me it was a personal matter and it had nothing to do with the school. I then approached the boy’s family and they were rude and did not seem to care about what I was saying.”
The alleged bullying, the mother claimed, continued.
“Her grades were slipping and she was not the same. In May, I told my daughter to return the teddy bear he had given her before the dance as it was a constant reminder of the sexual assault.”
On the day the soft toy was returned, the mother claimed that when she arrived at school to pick up her daughter, the boy had attacked her.
“I stood outside my car and he came at me. To defend myself, I blocked my face and he got hurt. He went to the police station with his family and opened a case of assault. I was let off with a warning.”
The bullying continued, she said. “I was fed up. The school refused to intervene and his family was not bothered. I thought I could sort this out with them but this was certainly not the case. In June I opened a case of sexual assault against the boy at the Town Hill police station and reported the matter to the (KwaZulu-Natal) Department of Education.”
She said her daughter cried every night.
“She tries to put on a brave face but I can see she is unhappy. I tried to enrol her into another high school but there are no places."
“All I want is for action to be taken against the boy and the bullying to stop.”
The boy’s family, school and SGB were approached for comment, but all declined.
Department spokesperson Sihle Mlotshwa said the onus was on the school to handle the matter in line with its code of conduct.
There were “serious allegations” against the male pupil, he said.
“We are disappointed that principals are letting the act of bullying go so far… Principals must address these issues.”
Police spokesperson Lieutenant-Colonel Thulani Zwane confirmed a case of sexual assault had been opened and was under investigation.