By Sharon Gordon
We’re all about being safe these days but are we remembering to have safe sex? It’s almost as if we can only worry about one pandemic at a time. HIV, unwanted pregnancy and STD’s continue unabated and yet It's easy to have sex safely without sacrificing a good time.
Here are my tips for staying healthy while having fun.
General Guidelines:
Use condoms for intercourse (vaginal and anal).
Use a latex barrier during all types of oral sex
Use latex gloves or finger cots for hand or finger penetration of the vagina or anus.
Use condoms on sex toys used by more than one person for any type of penetration (change the condom for each person) or on toys that go from anus to vagina.
Use only water-based lubricants with latex products. Oil of any kind. Vaseline and hand lotion included, destroys latex. Steer clear of so-called "water-soluble" lubes, which frequently contain oil. Store Latex products in a cool, dry place.
Never re-use latex products and avoid using them after the expiration date.
If you’re allergic to Latex there are alternatives on the market.
Condoms
Use only latex or polyurethane condoms. Natural skin condoms are not effective barriers to viruses.
When putting condoms on, pinch the air from the reservoir tip and roll onto the penis or toy. (A trapped air bubble can cause the condom to break.) Uncircumcised men should pull their foreskins back to help prevent the condom from slipping. A drop of lube inside the tip of the condom can enhance sensation for the wearer. Don’t use too much or the condom will slip off.
The actual variation in condom size is slight, but features vary between brands, so experiment to see which you like best! If he tells you he is too big for condoms make a fist and put the condom over that – you’ll just how big the get.
Most condoms are lubricated with either a wet, gel or a dry silicone powder.
Can't stand the taste of the condom you can use a lubricant. Try a flavoured brand. Like dry Durex, Assagai , Feminine Revolution, or Shunga (all available on the lolamontez.co.za website). You may also want to try using a water-based flavoured gel or lube.
Add lubricant when using a condom during intercourse to reduce friction and the chance of breakage.
Latex Gloves and Finger Cots
Latex gloves are thin, resilient and transmit both sensation and temperature beautifully. They make rough hands with jagged nails sleek and smooth—especially important for anal play.
Gloves make washing up between anal and vaginal play unnecessary— simply change your gloves.
Finger cots, which resemble mini-condoms, are convenient barriers when one finger is being used for penetration, or for small sex toys.
Try the Ox Glove. It is a latex glove with textured finger tips. Use it with a lubricant for extra pleasure.
The Female Condom
The Female Condom is cylindrical with a soft ring at each end and is worn by the receptive partner for vaginal or anal intercourse. Its polyurethane, so oil-based lubricants can be used.
The Female Condom is a loose-fitting polyurethane sheath with a soft ring at each end. Although it was designed for women to wear during vaginal intercourse, it can also be worn by the receptive partner for anal intercourse. It should be used once only (like traditional male condoms) and should not be used in conjunction with male condoms or a diaphragm.
There is more information on how to best use the female condom on the site. Female Condoms are still a novelty and not as widely used as the male version. Dental dams are another way to protect yourself from infection especially during oral sex. They are little squares of latex and were not originally designed for what you have in mind. Dentists use them to isolate a tooth during dental procedures. However, an extremely sensual individual thought of using dams for cunnilingus (mouth/tongue contact with female genitals) and analingus (mouth/tongue contact with the anus), and so, a new method of playful, safer sex was born. You can also use a cut-open condom, Gladwrap or a latex glove.
Having safe sex and protecting yourself from unwanted pregnancy or diseases is essential to a happy and fulfilling sex life. Take the time to discuss the options with your partner.
If you’re in a monogamous relationship (and you are both monogamous) then you can consider just using birth control. There are many options available, find the one that suites you. But remember birth control does not control the spread of the HIV virus or other sexually transmitted diseases. Be safe out there – I’d love to hear your comments – email me n [email protected]